Resistance

 You exist only as a force that resists the movement of life.

The tragedy of self-consciousness is that its very existence is maintained only in resistance to the very forces that allow its existence in the first place. It is only through resistance that 'you' as a separate self conscious entity can maintain your sense of self.

The life process in some strange mysterious way allows the arising of self-consciousness, whose very maintenance is possible only through continually resisting the life process. Weird thing.

The fundamental fear

 What is our fundamental fear?

It is the fear that comes from the sense of being a separate entity. The sense of being a separate conscious entity facing a vast surrounding environment that continuously interacts with it and results in its ultimate destruction or death. The fear that arises from the sense of being a separate entity is that somehow this 'me' will cease to exist. All our efforts are directed towards the preservation of self consciousness.

What is often overlooked is the fact that it is the very forces of existence, which we fear will destroy us, that in the first place allows for the arising of the self consciousness, or the sense of being a separate entity.

It is purely due to the forces of the ever-changing life process that even allows for the arising of a separate self. It is only through the activity of the ceaselessly changing forces, which is the very nature of the indivisible life process, that 'you' as a 'separate' body-self are even allowed to be. Without the ceaselessly changing indivisible life process, existence itself would be impossible. Existence is nothing but the manifestation of the ceaselessly ever changing indivisible forces that we refer to as the life process. The very nature of the life process is to manifest itself through the process of ceaseless change. To stop change is to stop existence, which is absurd. It is absurd because all there really is, is the ceaselessly changing activity of existing, that we call life/universe, and there is no stoppage to this.

So then, there is really no separate entity there that can stop the flow of the ceaselessly changing indivisible life process. The very self consciousness that is typing these words is an outcome of the ceaselessly changing indivisibly unfolding life process, which is the eternally flowing ever changing activity.

Since the sense of a separate self or 'self-consciousness' is an outcome of the ceaselessly changing indivisibly unfolding life process, the question of its destruction is ultimately irrelevant and meaningless.

And it makes no difference if this is realized or not.

Knowing

We can only know things through analogies. We can know something only in relation to something else. What is X? X is like Y, etc. Absolute knowing seems impossible, since there is no analogy or something to compare it to or any reference point. This is where we enter the realm of paradox. Our inability to know something for what it is and not just in reference to something else. It is the reason for our failure to understand what is existence. Since existence cannot be compared or referenced to anything else. Non-existence is a meaningless concept when addressed to the totality of existence.

Root of confusion

Confusion arose with the arising of self consciousness. In the absence of self-consciousness, there is nothing there that is separate from the life process to wonder about its own existence. Only with the arising of self-consciousness (which is again a product of the bodily process for life regulation) arises a sense of a separate self, which then start to wonder about its own existence.

Without the self-consciousness, there is nothing other than the life process to even wonder about anything. Even, with the self-consciousness, there is nothing other than the life process, since the self-consciousness arises from the life process itself, which creates a sense of subjectivity/self that seems to be separate from the surrounding.

So, since there is only the life process and no actual separate self or entity, there is no you and no God and nothing else other than the life process. 

Cause of sufferring

Mental and psychological suffering is a product of the development of self consciousness and its recursive nature of self reflection, resulting in feedback loops.

Where there is no self consciousness, no mental suffering is possible. 

Self consciousness is a facet that developed over the course of evolution in the brain of the human species, allowing them to develop exponentially , but at the cost of tremendous psychological trauma and suffering. 

The most important realization

 The single most important realization is to discover the indivisibility of life.

Feeling as isolated individuals, facing an incomprehensible vastness and darkness, can be unbearable.

Until it is seen through that all life is one indivisible process and that the feeling of being an isolated individual is not an indicator of the true state of affairs, your deepest fears will keep lingering.

So please keep reminding yourself whenever you feel afraid, that all life is one indivisible process and it is impossible for 'you' to be separate or apart from it.

Since it is already so, no effort or activity is needed, but simple noticing.

Noticing that which is ceaselessly overlooked.

The indivisibility of life and the absence of separation.

All is One.

Absolute and the world

 The world exists as a virtual solution to a virtual problem.

In the absolute state, or that which exists, there is no way of knowing or experiencing itself. Since the absolute is all there is, it has no way of knowing itself or experiencing itself as it is. So, it sort of creates an unknown. Since the absolute is unable to know itself as it is, this very inability becomes a virtual problem and the world is manifested. But the world is not actually manifested. Its existence is based on the inability of the absolute to know itself and is hence based on confusion (not knowing).

There is no way out of it. But then, its not a real problem. And it doesn't matter that there is no way out.

Reality

 What is real? 

Awareness aware of itself.

There are no objects of awareness. Only awareness.

And that is your real identity.

The social game

 The social game that we play is designed to prevent the falling into enlightenment. If you are able to fully stop getting pulled in by the social game, enlightenment will be natural. And yet...

Biggest Fear

 My biggest fear is the fear of future suffering.

This fear overtakes the mind even in the good times and easy times.

Even though I am having an easy time now, what if the future gets worse?

Even though I am not suffering much now, what if the future brings more suffering?

The mere prospect of future suffering prevents me from living in the moment in peace.

Not knowing where I stand or being unsure of where I stand contributes even more to this fear.

The only solace is wherever you are, you are always in awareness. 

Wherever your are, remember to remain aware.

Awareness in all circumstances, favorable and unfavorable.

Darkness of Society

Our social system is rotten to the core.

Living life in society is a nightmare.

The social system is nothing but slave training. Its trains its participants to become slaves. And the more slavish you are, the more you are rewarded.

We are tamed into the social system. Tamed to be obedient slaves. Our true nature repressed. All the crimes and depression is an outcome of this social training.

The social system/society is the greatest evil. The darkness of humanity.

Its better to not be a part of it.

Feeling overwhelmed by confusion

Sometimes in life, it can get chaotic. Confusion can overwhelm. Clarity seems to be lost. A sense of failure looms overhead.

Just allow it to pass. Allow the silence to devour the confusions. Allow the silence to work out itself.

Let silence dissolve the noise and doubts.

Minor issues bothering the mind

One of the most frustrating aspects of life is that we spend our mental resources in services of irrelevant stuffs.

We spend our time worrying endlessly about non-issues and feeling offended and annoyed by minor tribulations. It's as though the mind has been trained to focus its energies on these trivial issues and then get upset over the fact that it gets upset about these trivial issues. And it only results in a headache.

Not really sure how it can be handled expect with awareness. Awareness help to un-train the mind back to its original condition.

And its helpful to remember that the base state is one of harmony and ease of being.

May you be liberated.

Remember

 Remember to be present. Present to life. Present to every moment. There is nothing else.

Way out of fear

One of my biggest fear is that I will have no mental peace as long as I live. That I will keep having financial stress as long as I live and never get the time for self reflection.

Just remember this then. At this very moment, you are aware. Notice that you are aware. This is the key.

Enduring constant stress takes a toll on your mental health. It makes you incapable to see a way out. In the end its our own thoughts that trap us.

Trapped within the maze of our own thoughts, all we see is darkness. Darkness of thought.

Blind to existence. Blind to the fact that you are alive in this universe. Blind to life. 

Carrying this darkness, this thought induced darkness.

Seek refuge. 

Go deep within. 

A dream

He set out on his journey full of hope and eager anticipation...

On his way, he met her, her eyes glowing like emeralds...

They came together, enjoying each other with all they had...

They could not be separated for even an instant...

And then she departed suddenly, without a word...

His world, shattered...

His dreams crushed...

He then continued alone...

Worked hard and made a name for himself...

Amassed a fortune...

Living alone...

Respected by all...

Into his old age...

And then she returned...

She was not alone, but with her family...

He asked her why did she leave suddenly...

And she said...

I never left...

Because I was always a memory...

And then he woke up, the clock almost striking dawn...

And wondered, what did I just live through...

And he saw her lying beside him...

And he smiled...

My Vision for humanity

There is no need to have a vision for humanity since all is one already and nothing else is really needed. Only gratitude.

Gratitude is enough to justify all of existence.

Excerpt ~ Awareness

Is your present awareness of "something" really undeniable? I think that it's this basic assumption which lies at the heart of the paradox you outline in the question details.

The crux of the matter is this: How can you be sure that what you feel to be you, as a fixed origin of conscious awareness, that has the quality of a 'something', and is aware of other 'somethings', is actually the true nature of your experience?

I posit that this feeling of ourselves, as fixed points of conscious attention, is actually an illusion created by the peculiar way the human mind functions, and that the true nature of our conscious experience is intrinsically mysterious. That is, what we are in the essence of our conscious awareness is a presence can't be 'pinned down', and does not have the quality of a fixed object.

What makes human consciousness very peculiar among life forms on this planet is not only that we can think in terms of symbols, but that within our prefrontal cortex we have an extra piece of circuitry that, because it allows us to watch our own thoughts as if we were aside from them, creates the illusion of a fixed locus of conscious awareness, that is the unchanging centre of our experience. In other words, the mechanism of being able to reflect upon the flow of thoughts creates the vivid experience that we are a fixed centre of awareness that is separate from the thoughts themselves, and the changing sensations of our subjective experience, but this feeling does not accurately reflect the true nature of our conscious awareness.

Take a look at this image:

The human experience of being a fixed centre of conscious awareness is almost exactly like this. In reality, there is no ring that is a substantial entity in itself, but rotating the sparkler through the air at a fast enough speed creates the illusion that there is. Our minds work in very much the same way. Because your thought process is constantly chattering away, and we have this extra circuit that allows us to watch this process as if we aside from it, this whole mechanism creates the very convincing illusion that there is an unchanging centre to our experience. But, like in the image, this feeling is created by a flow of constant change and is not a reality in and of itself. It is created by the dynamic mechanism of the mind, but is not actually intrinsic to our experience.

What has happened is that, due to millennia of human social conditioning, we have come to identify ourselves totally with this reflective extra piece of circuity because it creates the sense of being a fixed agent of conscious action, which is essential to complicated human activity. Furthermore, this feeling of being a fixed object is likely a deeply unconscious reaction to the sheer insecurity and impermanence of our own situation. That is, it gives us the feeling that we are not identical to the constant stream of change that characterises our ageing bodies, and the universe more generally, but the stable observer of these things. The peculiar nature of our reflective minds allows us to create the feeling that we are a substantial entity that stands aside from our experience, but we are mistaken in thinking that this feeling is the same thing as being a fixed centre, separate from the changing tides of experience.

Now, it is precisely this deeply entrenched feeling that we are a 'something' that has led to our assumption that this universe must, logically, be constituted by any number of other 'somethings' that interact with each other in a similar way that billiard balls do. That is, it is your illusory experience of yourself as a fixed, unchanging object that creates the subject/object duality that we take for granted. Because you feel yourself to be a substantial entity 'over here', in a fixed, unchanging position, you therefore infer that the tree outside your window must also have the same quality 'over there' (despite the fact that we know the tree is a highly dynamic process). What we don't see is that we only feel that we must exist in a universe of 'somethings' because we have the the vivid feeling that we ourselves are a 'something', but that this experience is an illusion.

So, what is the true nature of our conscious experience? Well, if you pay close attention to your own mind, you may become aware that there is a presence at the seat of your experience that is much more diffuse and difficult to objectify than what you ordinarily feel to be 'me', as the conscious mind. If you are able to go further, and still the thought process altogether through a practice such a meditation, you may make the rather shocking discovery that there isn't really a centre to your experience at all. That is, there is change in your experience, and there are sensations, but there is not a substantial entity to which these experiences pertain. The true nature of your conscious experience can't actually be pinned down by the mind, and yet that is what you fundamentally are. It is more akin to the nature of water than of a fixed object. Your true nature is a sort of 'flowing', but there is no point from which the flowing seems to emanate.

Furthermore (and even more shocking), implied by the realisation that there is actually no centre to your experience, there is also the realisation that you can't actually find anywhere within direct experience a division between what you define as yourself, and what you define as the universe 'out there', because there is no fixed point at which you can stand and say, "Here I am!". That is, it doesn't appear that there is any point to stand aside from experience or confront it. There is simply this single flow of experience happening, and it can't actually be 'bitted' or divided up into separate things, because none of it has the quality of an object. Neither consciousness or reality experienced without the filter of the thought process seem to possess the quality of 'thingness', and so we can't actually say where one form begins and other ends. Reality as directly experienced seems to have the quality of a single integrated field of energy, that essentially 'flows', and there doesn't seem to be anyone (or anything) that can, as it were, stand aside from this flow and examine it as if they were separate from it. There is merely the indivisible flowing, and everything that exists is that.

Basically, what you are at the deepest level is change. But the extremely spooky thing is that there is nothing doing the changing. The apprehension that this universe consists of separate, indivisible objects to which change happens is an illusion created by the primary illusion of your feeling yourself to be an unchanging object. Not only is 'change' simply an independent reality in and of itself, totally unknowable to the mind, but since nothing that exists has the quality of an unchanging object, the whole universe is essentially irreducible. That is, as ludicrous as it sounds, there is no actual difference between you and the tree outside your window, or the rings of Saturn, because there is no 'point' at which experience can be cleft into fundamentally separate parts. You are not a substantial entity that lives 'in' a universe, 'on' a planet called Earth, but the indivisible fabric of the cosmos itself, experiencing itself from the point of view that you call 'me'. And, the basic essence of the whole show is, well, nothing. Or, rather, 'no-thing'. Every single one of us is the entire cosmos and nothing simultaneously, because the notion that the universe is separated out into distinct objects is nothing other than a stubbornly persistent human social fiction.

So how can something come from nothing? Well, it can't, because as totally absurd as it may sound, 'something' is merely a phantom created by the peculiar mind of man. What we call the human condition, and all the struggles and frustrations that accompany it, is nothing other than an ongoing futile attempt to make nothing into something; to pin down and hold onto a universe the very nature of which is change. We are not a superior species, but a cosmic joke; the grandest hoax never played on nobody.

~Sam sara

The one question

Ultimately, your experience of life boils down to one fundamental question:

Are you grateful for being alive?

Simple living

What needs to be understood in order to calmly navigate life?

- Don't seek refuge in the mind, but in the body. The body is alive. Aliveness is the very essence of the body. The aliveness of the body generates the mind and the self.

Realize that the aliveness is fundamental. Not the mind or the self. The mind generates anxiety, fear and paranoia. The body enjoys the bliss of simply being alive.

The more you are able to be with the body and its simple joy of being, the less you are impacted by the troubles and worries of the mind.

The mind creates misery. The mind creates its own entanglements. The mind creates problems. The mind creates complexity.

The body does not create anything and only experiences the sensation of being alive without any obstructions. 

And yet

We live our lives always yearning for something. Never quite satisfied. Always moving. With no idea about what it is that we are searching for.

Where is this seeking leading us? Is there a goal? And endpoint? What if there is no endpoint? What if this seeking is all there is...? And who is it that seeks? Is there a seeker?

And yet....

And yet....

And yet.....

.
.
.
.

And yet....

Wisdom of silence

Nature operates without language, in silent communication. Wisdom begins with the appreciation of silence.

Saving for retirement

Saving for retirement is the most important financial action that you need to take. And your biggest ally is the power of compounding. Invest in equity index funds. This will guarantee a very favorable nest egg on retirement.

The key lies in disciplined execution.

Effects of alcohol - Give up alcohol

Alcohol dims consciousness. It makes you slightly less conscious. This alone is enough reason to give up all forms of alcohol, including the occasional drink. This includes all forms like breezer, beer, mojito. Give up all forms of alcohol, even the moderate ones.

The known and The unknown

- Existence exists is the only certainty. Nothing more can be said.

- We have no idea what is existence.
- We have no idea about the cause of existence.
- We have no idea about the meaning of life.
- We have no idea about what we should be doing.
- We have no idea about who we are.
- We have no idea about what is the world and the universe.
- All we have are our fantasies and imaginations.
- We have no idea what is going on.
- We have no idea about life.
- We have no idea about death.

In fact, it seems that the longer you live and the more deeply you observe, the less certain you become. You begin to see the terrifying extent of the unknown.

As you get older, you acquire the skill of seeing through all the BS.

The only intention

No matter how bad or how god life gets, you are always present in this very moment. To feel your roots in the present moment. It takes no special skill for this. Only intention.

Separation and thought

What ultimately matters?

When there is no real separation, it does not matter what happens or does not happen.

The stronger the belief in separation, the stronger the hold of thought.

With the weakening in the belief in separation, thought starts to release its hold.

In perfect oneness, thoughts arise and disappear of their on accord. In the absence of the belief in separation, there is no holding on to thoughts.

The biggest trap

The biggest trap in life is to indulge in fantasy. Believing in fantasies is life's biggest trap. And the self is the biggest fantasy.

Existence

Existence exists. Thats it. Thats all. Nothing more. Nothing less.

The self

The self is fabricated. Created as a refuge from the demands of the world. A personal inner refuge and a world that we can dwell within. A protection from the harshness of reality. The fabricated self is a coping mechanism. And yet, it is that which creates the separation. For the fabrication of the self is the birth of separation. And the loneliness. Our gift that becomes the curse.

To be rooted in awareness

Ultimately, it all boils down to this simple fact. To be free from dreaming and remain rooted in just the sensations of the body is the only crown of life. Consciousness belongs to the body. To dwell simply as a body is the final realization.

Fantasy and reality

We have a strong tendency to believe in fantasy. We deeply cherish them, as though the worst fate that can befall us is the destruction of our fantasies and dreams. Our fantasies are too close to part with. Anything, any stories or beliefs that supports our fantasies immediately attracts us. We would rather choose death and suffering over renouncing our deeply cherished fantasies.

The prospect of facing reality as is, without any fantasies, is simply too terrifying. 

The core problem statement

The core problem statement in life is the existence of the self. Or self consciousness.
Self-consciousness is the root of all problems.

In the absence of self-consciousness, there are no problems or suffering. Except for physical survival and physical pain, there is no other problem in the absence of self consciousness.

Self consciousness is developed as a survival mechanism, but has been glorified into unimaginable proportions. The extreme importance given to self consciousness has resulted in all kinds of psychological suffering.

Life plan

1. Decide which country to settle down in by 2025. (at 40) - else default
2. Initiate buying a house by 2026. (at 41)
3. Initiate starting a family after completing 1 and 2. (early 40s)
4. Plan for ~20 yrs of work life post 40 (repaying home loans, saving for retirement, raising family).

The self

The self or self consciousness is a creation of the unconscious processes of life. That's really all there is to it. Its like a perfume from a flower or smoke from a fire. No independent existence of its own. An effect of the unconscious life processes. To say anything about it is futile.

Maturity

We are easily swayed by promises of fulfillment. By illusions of completion. To not fall for promises of fulfillment is the mark of maturity. To recognize the illusory nature of all attainments.

Deepest sorrow

All we have at the end of the day are our memories, hopes, desires, fantasies, dreams, sorrows, regrets. We only live our stories. We only exist withing our stories. Outside of the story, there is absolutely nothing we can ever know. Our self exists only as the subtlest and deepest aspect of our personal and collective story line.

Our meanings exist only in our stories. We exist only in our stories. All we are at the end of the day are the stories. Outside the story, we don't exist and can can never know what is.

And this is the deepest sorrow of our lives.

Best investment

The best investment that you can make is to invest in your livelihood. Forget about the self and all these things.

Our misery

Let us ask the question about why are we working?

Living life in society results in expenses. If these expenses cannot be met on your own, you need to live on charity of others. If you cannot meet these expenses nor live on the charity of others, you move into raw survival mode and are forced to live by the law of the jungle. Then it comes down only to your ability to survive anyhow. For this, you need to be free from disease and ill health.

Unfortunately, if you are not able to meet expenses through yourself or the charity of others and you are in ill health, either physical or mental, death will meet up with you. And then you are free.

Ill health results from disturbance of balance. To come back to balance, that which is causing imbalance needs to be destroyed. Generally, if you are balanced and well, you will survive, but not indefinitely.

Eventually, you will be free from it all. Death is the great liberator.

Ultimately nothing matters, so don't worry.

All that we have is the suffering of our own thoughts, experiences, fears, sorrows and miseries.

The fundamental knowing

The fundamental fact, that lies behind all other facts, is that I exist and I know that I exist. This comes before all else. Before even considering that which is around you, the first consideration is of your own existence. Nothing is more fundamental. I exist and know that I exist.

This existence of myself and the knowing of it is effortless. It is the only effortless understanding. To know something other than yourself requires some thought/fabrication and hence some effort.

To remain in the effortless knowing of yourself is to just be yourself. You know yourself because you are yourself. It is a knowledge through being. To know something other than yourself is knowledge without being the other thing.

So, self knowing is the fundamental knowing. 

Deepest thought

I know that I exist.

On pleasure and pain

Pleasure and pain, both end in emptiness.

And emptiness begins and ends in itself.

The source

The stillness of knowing mind.

And the dynamism of outward expression.

Are both rooted in the same source.

And that source is right here this very moment.

The cure for addiction

One thought:

Remember

Silence is your deepest core.

Addiction and God

Addiction is a cry for help. As long as we don't find our true rest in God, we will live lives of addiction. Our feeling of separation from God causes our escape into addiction. An addiction is a cry out to God. So go inwards and face your pain. Instead of escaping into addiction. Then maybe you may find God waiting fro you?

We all feel pain and despair. It is God calling us inward. So wouldn't be rude to escape outwards into fantasy when pain calls us inward?

The root cause of addiction

The root cause of addiction is the refusal to face pain.

The root cause of addiction is the feeling that something is missing.

Addiction begins with the desire to escape from pain. To escape from boredom. To escape from the mundane. To escape from the present reality. To escape from the void. And this escape takes many forms. From eating to drinking to gossiping to alcohol to social media checking to porn to masturbation to drugs, each with a differing intensity. An escape from the present reality into a fantasy world or a pleasure sensation. And with each escape, a neural pathway is formed. And as this behavior is repeated, these pathways get stronger and deeper. And the brain stops producing its natural feel good hormones. And the feedback loop continues. This makes it even more painful to face the present reality and requires a larger dose of the addicting item to feel the same pleasure intensity.

To avoid falling into the trap of addiction, the only way is to refuse to escape from the present reality, no matter how painful it may be. Willingness to accept the painful reality and take refuge within is the only way out. In fact, treat suffering as a blessing in disguise. Do not try to escape the pain. Do not try to escape from your self.

Remain as you are enduring the present moment, no matter how painful. The only refuge is within. Stop seeking pleasurable sensations to kill the pain.

Yes, life is painful and filled with suffering and despair. No matter what your circumstance, suffering cannot be escaped from. Pain cannot be escaped from. Pleasure seeking is not the purpose of life.

Life can sometimes seem dull, boring, mundane, serious and lacking excitement. Sometimes, all that you desire is to escape the dullness and monotony. And this escape can take many forms. But invariably, the dullness returns. No matter how many times you try to escape it through pleasure and fantasy, the dullness always returns. And this can be depressing. And you might cry out in despair from the very pits of your soul. But this despair and dullness has depth. A depth that when followed through will lead you deep inside your self. Escaping into fantasy will not accomplish anything. It will only bring more misery.

Meaninglessness, despair and dullness may not be easy to endure. But the alternative route of escaping into fantasy is not a better option. In fact, in the long term, it only makes your misery worse.

Hence whenever despair strikes, just be with it. Look into it. Do not escape into fantasy.

If nothing, remember this. Mental health and sanity is the most valuable treasure. Sanity lies in facing reality head on. Mental health is freedom from fantasy. A pure mind is one with no fantasies. And this my friend is your best friend. It will never fail you.

Its strange but the way out of addiction is to seek pain instead of pleasure.

The Infinite

Let us consider a concept closest to the ultimate truth. It could be either of these words:

Infinite
Absolute
Unlimited
Final/Ultimate truth
God

The above could be considered as synonyms. We will use the term infinite. And begin with the existence of the infinite.

Infinite is that which is not finite. Hence, it is that which has no measure. It is that which liberates us from the finite and limited. It cannot be imagined, since imagination is finite. The infinite cannot be limited or finite. In fact, there is no scope for the existence of the finite within the infinite. Just like darkness cannot exist in the light. That which we experience as love here is but a shadow of the infinite love.

Can the infinite have a form?
The infinite can have no form, since any form is a limitation and finite. So, if the infinite has no form, how are we to know it or grasp it? And if it cannot be known, how then can it be of any benefit?

Although the infinite cannot be known as a form, its existence can only be absolute. The nature of the infinite must be that it is inescapable. Whether there is form or no form, the infinite remains as the infinite. So, is there that which is forever present? That which is unquestionable? That, by virtue of not being formed into anything remains forever untouched and absolute?

And who am I in regards to the infinite? What is my relationship to the infinite? Imagine that there is the form-less infinite and the innumerable finite forms. What is the relationship between them? Can the infinite have any relationship to the finite? Can the infinite give rise to the finite?

The infinite cannot give rise to the finite. Nothing finite can give rise to the infinite. And there cannot be two infinities. Thus, the infinite is self caused or self existent and cannot arise from something other than itself. Being self existent and uncaused, the infinite cannot give rise to the non-infinite or finite.

This leads to the conclusion that the infinite cannot co-exist with the finite. So, either there is no infinite or there is no finite. But it is absurd that there be no infinite, since the very starting point of our analysis was the existence of the infinite. Thus, it must be that there is no finite. Which brings us to the conclusion that there is only the infinite. And it has no form. So all forms are not real, but merely a reflection of the form-less infinite. And that infinite is God. Amen.

Goodness

It takes courage to be good. A fundamental goodness of heart is key to a trouble free life. Without goodness of heart, sharpness of intellect and depth of insight are of no use. In fact, it is preferable to have a good heart instead of a sharp intellect. Kindness trumps intelligence in the end. A good heart coupled with sharp intellect leads to clarity.

Gratitude

The biggest gratitude is just in being alive and experiencing life. Nothing else actually needs to be added to this. The simple fact of existence and being conscious is enough to be grateful Nothing else is needed. This is the holy realization.

Excerpt ~ Sam Sara

What an enlightened individual basically realises is that there is something fundamentally delusional about the way that most human beings think, and, by extension, experience themselves. This delusion is not intrinsic to our nature, but almost invariably seems to occur when human beings come together to form a community or society. This delusion, therefore, is basically ubiquitous among our species.

Before explaining the nature of this delusion, in order to give some foundation, I first want to describe as best as possible what reality looks like from the 'enlightened' point of view, which is how it is from the natural awareness of the human being, prior to the distortions created by thought. From the enlightened point of view, it is vividly apparent that existence is all one process. Now, the modern analytic philosopher would say that this is a meaningless statement, because we can only speak meaningfully about interactions between objects, not about what is common to all objects, but this is kind of the point.

What the enlightened individual realises is that there are no separate objects or entities, so we cannot actually speak meaningfully about the true state of affairs of the cosmos. What we call the universe is actually a single, integrated field of behaviour that cannot be fundamentally divided. What the individual previously believed to be a universe of discreet entities or separate events that, as it were, shove each other about, is seen to be one unified 'happening', which manifests itself as unique, but interdependent aspects. In other words, there is absolutely no real division between you and the tree outside your window. Both are merely different aspects of one seamless process, without other. When this is seen clearly, very basic and seemingly undeniable human axioms such as causality, determinism, and even individual free will, completely collapse.

The whole premise of causality is that this universe is divided up into discreet entities or events that act upon each other in a similar way that billiard balls do (the Newtonion model of the cosmos). If, however, we see that all phenomena are in fact different aspects of the same, unified process, then we also see that the universe is really just one big event, without prior cause, or ultimate effect. What appear to be discreet entities are really like waves on the same ocean, where each wave is an expression of the whole ocean. Similarly, the illusion of individual free will is founded upon the assumption that we are all independent islands of behaviour. Not so. In reality, every single one of us are unique aspects of one universal will, and our relationship to each other is rather like branches on the same tree. This is not, however, to say that we are all the puppets of an underlying will, as fatalists assume. This is still perceiving in terms of an illusory division between me 'in here' and the universe 'out there'. There is absolutely no real division anywhere. It's all one process.

What makes spiritual enlightenment (we could really use a new term; I nominate 'truth realisation') the ultimate and final insight is the realisation that, because everything is one, existence is, and always was, a done deal. It's all already complete, and there never was anything fundamentally to know, pursue, control, or hold on to, because these assumptions rest upon the delusion that there exists a knower or an agent separate from that which they are attempting to know or manipulate. All of existence, however, is really just the dynamic energy patterns of a single underlying principle, the purpose of which is simply to experience itself. The whole universe is really something like the symphony of one composer, or the dream of a single dreamer, that is fulfilled simply by the very fact of its own existence.

So, the delusion that human beings fall into is that, when we form communities, we confuse the world of language and symbols, which we use to communicate, with the universe as it is experienced directly, prior to thought. In our complete identification with language, which is really a way of dividing experience into cognizable chunks for purposes of control, we lose sight of the fact that experience isn't actually divided up in this way at all. Thus, what is actually a single field of behaviour, that all goes together, appears to us as a constant battle between fundamentally conflicting parts. For the most part, all that human beings are really doing in life is struggling to uphold the delusion of separateness at all costs, because the essence of power, of any kind, is the belief that what you're doing is something fundamentally distinct from what I'm doing. If we were to come clean on the fact that we are all actually just different aspects of one process, all our power structures would fall apart, because we could not legitimately praise or blame anybody for living the 'right' way, or the 'wrong' way. In short, civilisation as we know it would collapse. This is why the insight we call enlightenment has always historically been esoteric, and many have been chastised or even killed for trying to spread it. Nothing could be more undermining to authority than the realisation that we are all one process. It's the dirty, great elephant in the room of humanity.

If we see things in the correct way, however, we see that the idea of having power over the environment, or other people, is not only delusional, but completely absurd. What the fact that we are all one process really means is that your own deepest, unconditioned will is absolutely one and the same as the will of all other living things, because it all fits together, like pieces of the same jigsaw puzzle. If one individual tries to resist the dynamic of the whole, or beat the the rest of life into submission to his own personal ideas as to how things should be, he is not only in conflict with the world, but also with himself, which, of course, are really the same thing. Just like if one member of an orchestra tries to play louder than all the other members, through fear of not being heard, he ruins the whole orchestra, if one aspect of the universal whole tries to bend the whole to its own will, this only really serves to destroy everything. Yet, many human beings alive today are intent on doing precisely this, and it is for this reason that the species, and the planet as a whole, increasingly finds itself in such trouble.

In short, the enlightened individual is really only someone who has come clean about the truth which basically all of us spend our lives unwittingly trying to avoid. He doesn't learn some new, obscure truth, only 'unsees' everything that was already untrue. In other words, there is the falling away of what was always false, not the acquisition of something new. The truth is that this whole universe is one will, and so therefore all our individual attempts to control it, pin it, resist, or hold onto it, are not only futile, but magnificently absurd, like a dog chasing its own tail. We are a planet full to the brim of lunatics desperately trying to stick pins into their own ends, because we cannot stand the fact that we are all one process. Why can't we stand it? Because it means that we can't hold on to each other, or the world, because there is no 'I' that is fundamentally separate from that which I am attempting to hold on to. It is somewhat ironic, then, that in the end, it will be our attempts to control or save the world that will be what destroys it.

Fear of judgement

We fear social stigma more than even death. Fear of being inappropriately labelled by society is a deep fear. Fear of being perceived in negative light.

Thus, we are bound by the perceived judgement of society. We fear being negatively judged, no matter the reason, as though our survival depends on it.

Is it because we think that our survival depends on being positively perceived by others? Any thoughts? 

The invisible self (excerpt)

The outside world is a visible reflection of the invisible processes that defines a being. What defines a being comes from the invisible side of things, and what a being ultimately seeks is the one who is doing the definitions. It is only when the being will focus its attention upon the invisible within itself, that the being will nourish the one who is doing the definitions. Otherwise, the being only nourishes the definitions themselves, and thus gets caught up into their temporal states, rather than remaining one with it’s natural and eternal state as that which remains forever invisible.

To nourish the invisible side of ourselves is to nourish the eternal side of ourselves, for the invisible side is always present wherever and whenever we are. When we nourish the visible side of ourselves, we feed that which is temporal, not eternal. To do so constantly within a repeating pattern, generates mental vortices which sucks the attention of the being within temporal manifestations of itself, thereby placing the attention of the being upon that which will forever remain unstable. Those temporal manifestations are manifestations in the visible domain, of the constant interactions that exists between the visible and the invisible, in the macro and micro perspectives of the universe. Those interactions generates movement which is a direct manifestation of change for nothing visible can remain the same forever - the visible being forever modified by the invisible!!!

The same relationship is true in the human side of things as well, for it is true that for a human being, the constant interactions between the visible/sensed and the invisible/unsensed domains, generates the movement which is responsible for the experience of life itself. The constant cycle going from one state (invisible/unsensed) to the other (visible/sensed) and back into the one state (invisible/unsensed) again - repeat ad infinitum -, will generate the movement that is responsible for the vibrations of light/energy itself. For the goal of light/energy is to return to it’s invisible/unsensed state, to which it does cyclically at the rate of the plank unit of time, or at the smallest possible unit of time. At each time it returns to it’s invisible/unsensed state, light/energy releases the light/energy that it carried while on the visible/sensed state, into the invisible/unsensed domain. Through the release of that light/energy within the “invisible/unsensed domain”, that light/energy instantly dissapears from our 3d space-time continuum, and enters the realm of the invisible/unsensed continuum, so as to “pick” the information found within that realm and bring it back to the visible/sensed continuum.

Within the invisible realm, the light/energy gets impregnated with wathever information that is to be found at that specific moment within it. The light/energy returns to the visible/sensed domain - after the smallest possible unit of time possible, known as the plank time -, fully charged with what it has brought back from the invisible/unsensed domain. The light/energy releases that charge instantly within the visible/sensed domain, thus releasing the total expressions of the total impressions it has brought back from the invisible/unsensed domain. The invisible/unsensed domain imprints the light/energy with content/information that will be released within the visible/sensed domain at the next plank unit of time, or at the next “flash of light/energy” within the visible/sensed domain. Each time the light/energy flashes it’s contents/informations - coming from the invisible/unsensed domain - within the visible/sensed domain, the visible/sensed domain is updated. After this moment, the light/energy returns back into the invisible/unsensed domain in order to generate the next generation/iteration of the visible/sensed domain for the being to experience. This process is never ending but to resume, the visible/sensed domain is the space where the imprints received from the invisible/unsensed domain, carried within light/energy, are released, while the invisible/unsensed domain is the space where the packets of light/energy are imprinted and charged by the contents/informations found within the invisible/unsensed domain.

The visible is made true when we perceive ourselves through the senses, which doesn’t specifically equate to our sight. Our senses gives us specific information about specific wavelengts of the light/energy. Those specific wavelengths of the light/energy, gives specific information to those specific areas of the brain which can detect those specific wavelength of the light/energy. For some areas of the brain, those differenciated wavelengths are detected as sight. For others, they are detected as sound, as smell, as taste or as touch. The common denominator within them all, is that they are all different interpretations of the same light/energy. A light/energy which exists, forever in a constant relationship with the invisible.

It is at the moment where the invisible meets the visible side of things, that the present is made true. The Now is the constant manifestation of this process throughout eternity. It is only in the Now that the invisible side of things comes into direct contact with the visible side of things, for it is only in the forever changing Now, that the invisible is made true.

What a being seeks, is to reunite itself with the invisible side of things, for the eternal being EXISTS within the invisible side of things, not the visible. This is demonstrated through the simple fact that the one who is doing the thinking remains forever invisible - the “visible being”, being only temporal manifestations of the “invisible being”. The invisible, in and as itself, can never be demonstrated, for as soon as it is, it’s essence changes into something new. Every new other things will forever come and replace every demonstrations of the invisible as a thing, thus rendering every demonstrations of the invisible as a thing to be forever false witnesses of the invisible as no thing.

The only true witness of the invisible is the invisible itself in action. And that invisible is the subjective side of a being.

To seek ourselves into the visible, is to seek the source of ourselves within what we are not. We are not the visible, for the visible is a temporal manifestation of the intemporal being that we seek, and is thus not the being that we are. That being is the eternal being of which we are truly and forever one with - we are forever one with it for we are forever one with the invisible side of things -, for we are the invisible being which forever processes the visible into something new. The being that we seek exists as the invisible side of a being, and the invisible side exists as the inner subjectivity of a being. However, the paradox is that the invisible side of a being is and cannot be limited or expressed through words for what it truly is, and therefore, cannot truly be expressed through words, for as soon as it is, it loses it’s attribute of invisibility, thus it loses it’s true nature/meaning as it is expressed. A word or a series of words can only point into the direction where the invisible exists within a being, but can never portray what the invisible is in and of itself.

We process the visible through us constantly changing it within the invisible side of ourselves. For it is within our invisible side that the processes of evolution, or the processes of change through transformations, occurs. These transformations are absolutely necessary, for the invisible is absolutely necessary, and for the invisible to be forever true, change has to be forever true. If change was somewhere, somewhat not true, then it wouldn’t even be possible to entertain any ideas upon existence. We wouldn’t exist. The only way for this absolute necessity to be true, is for the visible to change constantly through a process of evolution/”equilateral additions” that operates in the visible and invisible side of things. Everything changes constantly, but only at different rates. The invisible is the space within a being where the visible transforms itself into something new. It is the invisible space where the invisible creator as ourselves, modify the visible universe by transforming it so as to change, evolve and create the ever changing visible universe that we experience.

To try to put it more bluntly, the "invisible" that is referred to here is the aspect of a being which remains forever "invisible" to the being itself. It is the part of a being which is forever observant of the being and it's many manifestations - yet never to be observed. It is the part of a being that is never able to be seized, for it is the observer who forever observes that which the being expresses and receives. It is the inner realm from within which a being is placed and observes reality. It is the mental bubble that shields the sense of self from anything which surrounds it. In other words, it simply is the domain from within which the "presence" of a being operates. A domain which can never be fully seen or fully realised.

As an example, I, on one hand, cannot fully express all that I am within myself to any "observer" who "observes" the words that are being presented of me here. For whatever I am in full, cannot be completely expressed through the limiting constructs of the words that I choose. For who I am truly, is unlimited, and the unlimited cannot, in any circumstances whatsoever, be limited to a construct which is limited within and as itself (a construct such as a word). What I am and what I try to express of my being here, is the "observer" who will forever be found within the stance of the "observer", and not the stance of the "actor". Hence, whatever is seen of my expression here is related to the "actor" aspect of my being for the "observer" - you - who observes the words that I express. This is so simply because of the fact that my expression is "observed" through the words that I express or "act" out, whereas the "observer" can only be inferred within those words and not actually expressed as those words. Those words are the expressions of the "observer" acting itself out, thus they are the "actions" of the "observer" and not the "observer" itself. The words that I express here are not to be identified with the "actor" figure, for it is not the "actor" that I am trying to convey, but the "observer" who remains forever invisible behind the actions of the actor.

The "observer" is the permanent aspect of ourselves, as it will forever be a witness to all that will happen to ourselves, as well as to all that we will create and destroy. It is the invisible part of ourselves that remains forever permanent as the source and recipient of all of our experiences. It is the unchangeable, unmoved and forever observant aspect of ourselves which forever processes the informations that the senses brings back to it's awareness. It is invisible for otherwise, it would stop being what it is, which is "the observer" - or the "universe itself" experimenting itself through each and every one of us, yet never to be contained within any one of it's expressions. The "invisible" is only such from our limited perspective of all of reality, for whatever is now seen as being "invisible" is in fact "full of information", just as the "invisible observer" is "full of information" from the perspective of the one doing the observations ( for example: I as the observer of these words, am full of information, related or not to the subject at hand - either it being the information of what I did yerterday or the information of what I learned when I was in college -, even if I as the observer remains forever invisible).

It is not because something is invisible that it lacks information or content, for even the notion of invisibility itself contains a complete set of information that seeks to be discovered. That which is invisible contains information that is seeking to be known, just as the observer seeks to know itself through the information that it contains.

In simpler terms, the « invisible self » here is the « self » which is simply « forever present » just as the « forever present self » which is « currently present within you » as you read these words ! That self which is "currently present" within you, is that same self that I am talking about here, and not the self that you « perceive » yourself to be from within the self-limiting constraints/prisons of your thoughts. For you see, those selves (thoughts) are created out of the « temporal visions of self » that you have constructed as parts of your self within your minds. Yet, the true self is never to be found within them, for they are it’s temporal manifestations, not it's intemporal and all permeating one. The true self that is sought is intemporal in nature, thus it can only be found within the intemporal in itself.

That intemporal is that part of yourself which is forever invisible, for it is only the invisible self that has the ability to permeate all parts of existence. If that self were to be visible, it wouldn’t be able to « permeate all of existence », or all "moments of time", for it would be limited to the « visions/memories » it had of itself. Whatever the self is truly, is « not a vision » whatsoever, for it is that part of self which is forever « present » throughout all images/moments (visions/memories) that are reflected back to self in the Now moment. For it is the only part of self, which is never attached to any of those passing moments. Being « forever present » as your true self, such as the one who is reading these words at this very moment ! The self that i am « suggesting », wheter you are thinking about it or not, is « forever present » as your true self, and that « forever present self » can only be so through complete invisibility, such as the « invisible self » that is to be found within you as you read these words.

Wheter you want to or not, there is no escaping that « invisible self » for it is the « forever part » of you ! It is the part which never separates from you, for it being forever present such as the « present self » that you are at this particular moment in time… and this one… and this one… and the next one after that one… ad infinitum !!! Even when the last « images of self » will have dissapeared, the "invisible/present" self, will still be present. There is no escaping the invisible self since nothing can become it - nothing can become the invisible self - and you cannot escape that which hasn’t yet begun to become something, for such a thing is simply not there to begin with. It can never become something thus it can never end, for it has never even begun being something (what has an ending MUST have a beginning. Since the invisible self has no beginning, for if it had it wouldn’t be invisible, than it implies that it has no end as well – being thus the eternal and intemporal « you » which forever experiences your reality as you go along in all and every "Now" moments that you experience).

Since nothing can become the invisible self, and by « nothing » i mean « absolutely everything » that the « mind » can conceive of in place of that « nothing », and since the invisible self is « Now true » (it is in fact true that you have « Now » an invisible self within you, which is the invisible self who is narrating these words in your invisible mind at this invisible moment within you), it thus means that the only thing which is true across all times and epochs, is the invisible self !!! For the invisible self is forever true if it is « Now » true (the "visible-self" is "Now" "forever-false" because of being the "forever-dead/past-image-of-Now" relative to what the "Now" is at this particular moment in time, as experienced by the "invisible-self", while the "invisible-self" is "Now" "forever-true" because of being the « forever-alive/present-expressions-of-Now » in all of the "Now" experienced by the "invisible-self")!!! The invisible self is the only true part of self, for it permeates all times and epochs that is experienced by self. It is the only aspect about the « Now » which is forever true in all manifestations of the « Now » (the "invisible-self" is "forever-true" Now, because the "invisible-self" is true for every Now experienced by the "invisible-self" !).

What is enlightenment?

Enlightenment is simply the recognition of the non-physical dimension of life. To stumble into the void in the midst of manifestation.

Only need

The only need: Simply recognize the emptiness inherent in the world of forms and appearances. Bam! Your'e done for life :-)

The final resort

At the end of the day, even in unfavorable circumstances, you are still the ground of experience. The silent awareness, aware of itself. Only this is to be recognized again and again. No circumstance can prevent awareness being aware of itself. In the final analysis, this is all that matters.

Resentment

Resentment dwells up in the heart. It fosters malice and envy. The inability to accept the well being of another. Watching the well being of the object of resentment is torture for the mind. Resentment needs an object. The object is envied and hated. The question then is whether the resentment valid? Why not direct attention to your own well being instead of the object of resentment. Having resentment for an object is not good for your well being. Hence, if you value well being, liberate the object from resentment. Re-cognize what you are. Come back to emptiness. Liberate all objects.

Your resentment for an object has no effect on the object, but only makes your miserable. The only fruit of resentment is self-misery. Hence resentment is futile.

On the futility of the attempt to know the self

Knowledge is always of limitations. To know something is to know the limitations or boundary that defines the thing known. Self knowledge therefore is only possible if the self is limited. There can be no knowledge of an unlimited self. That which is unlimited cannot be known.

Gratitude list - Jan 2020

1. Self-knowledge
2. Mental health and sanity
3. Relatively satisfying job
4. PR done
5. Decent wife
6. Family

But remember that self knowledge (the unity of all things) trumps all. Knowing the One unit that exists with full certainty is all that's needed for sanity. 

Quora answers - best collections

Enlightenment is being aware, yes, but enlightenment is also much deeper than being aware.

Basically, "being aware" means finding consciousness, awareness, which also has been called "awareness which is aware of itself". When this awareness is found, it marks a permanent break of the identification with ego and the beginning of identification with this awareness itself. It feels like this awareness is "the real you". Some people feel like they don’t have any sense of identification at all at this point, which is somewhat premature. That's basically self-realization, but it is not yet enlightenment.

When this awareness is present effortlessly throughout all daily activities, that's what Adya calls the state of "abiding awareness" and what Ramana dubbed Sahaja Samadhi (effortless Samadhi).

But this awareness in itself is also a percept of the mind. It's the same as identifying with your Being, which is incomparably deeper than ego. At this point, there's still ego. The identification with it is broken, and it's broken for good, but it's not gone. But then the path to enlightenment begins.

This awareness, or the identification with it, to be exact, is what's needed for the rest of the ego to dissolve, that is, for the rest of suffering, restlessness, pain, tears and fears to arise and be accepted from this place, because this awareness doesn't differentiate, it accepts everything. Both Adya and Spira talk about it. Adya actually wrote a book about what happens after this awareness is found, it's called "The End of Your World". Spira speaks about it as "the light of consciousness" which illuminates the rest of conditioning.

When it becomes particularly deep, this awareness as the percept of the mind starts to dissolve. The identification moves to what's been described as "transcendental awareness", or awareness which isn't aware of itself. This is much deeper, one realizes his non-Being. By this point, most of the suffering is transcended and emotions almost don't arise. As Osho said, "once you find your Being, your Being starts to hurt you". Until you jump from Being into non-Being, that is. In the case of Ramana, it was described as his "second death". At that point, the ego truly surrenders. You have accepted death itself.

For what is being aware of awareness? Nothing. To realize you’re nothing is to accept death, from which comes the greatest freedom, the absolute freedom. Osho had a fun way of putting it, he once said: “In witnessing the witness, the ultimate ecstasy is created”. Awareness is the witness of the ego. When the ego is sufficiently small, you start to witness awareness itself, and only at that point you become truly nothing, dissolve into the void.

Later still, it is seen that Being and non-Being are one. That's The Absolute. Then even awareness which isn't aware of itself disappears from the mental landscape and you become completely ordinary again, just like you were before, no difference. Just serene and equanimous, but completely ordinary, not “enlightened”, not “aware”.

So, the process is basically realizing your Being, realizing your non-Being, and then realizing The Absolute. Or, in common language, you can say that first you think you're ego, then you realize you're Life itself, then you're realize you're also Death, and then you're realize that you're both and neither for life and death cannot exist without each other, and are just two sides of the same coin.

And thus, at the end of the process, awareness cannot be found. I know this sounds very weird, but I confirm it with my experience. Other people say the same thing. For example, Osho used to say that a completely enlightened person becomes completely unaware. He said, "if you wish, you can call it ignorance also". Ego is forgotten, awareness is forgotten, enlightenment is forgotten. One has relaxed totally. UG once said "the moment you're aware of your awareness, you're not aware". I think he was referring to the same thing. Finally, I think it was in the "Autobiography of a Jnani" where I read this gem: "A jnani cannot be said to be conscious. But neither he can be said to be unconscious". I know this sounds like a direct contradiction, but it’s not, really. It’s just framed this way deliberately, because only when you complete the journey, you will understand it.

The truth is, one doesn't need this spiritual language to describe what's going on. In reality, the moment you become "aware", you actually just become aware of your ego. That's all that is, really. You're always "aware" of your surroundings, that's unquestionable, otherwise you wouldn’t be able to function. But you're not aware of your mind. So when you find that awareness, that's the first time you become aware of your mind and the ego. And then the ego-mind starts to dissolve into it. And at the end of the process, this awareness cannot be found no longer, it served its purpose, simply because there's nothing more to be aware of. And the awareness of your surroundings (you see stuff and you know what you see) has always been there and it will always be there. So that's why a completely enlightened person cannot be said to be aware, and yet he is aware. He's just like he was before it all started, completely innocent in ignorance. Like small children are, like animals are - no baggage. A dreaming person is not aware of his mind and its deep unconscious patterns, one undergoing the transformation is aware of himself and is becoming more and more aware by uncovering and surrendering more of the mind’s conditioning, dissolving it into the light of awareness, whereas for an enlightened person, there’s nothing left to be aware of, his mind is empty, his ego is gone, and in this way, he is similar to an ignorant person and they are outwardly indistinguishable, and even he can no longer tell the difference between the two.

So, paradoxically, it starts with the present moment and it ends with the present moment. It’s just that at the beginning of the journey, the present moment includes self-referential thought, emotion and personality, and in the very end they are all absent, so there’s nothing but the deepest serenity and the pristine purity of the 5 senses. And all of the profound spiritual experiences (including oneness and no-doership), various awarenesses as percepts of the mind, various Samadhis and bodily sensations (kundalini) arise and fall on the way.

And that’s why focusing on the present moment and allowing all your internal experience is the most important thing in the whole journey. Be as you are. It will not necessarily unfold in such easily identifiable linear fashion, but the destination is still the same. Peace, contentment and equanimity.

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Ego is basically identity. Anything that is rigid has a side effect of restricting the flow of life, resisting it, on some level. There are many layers of ego, and it’s delusional to think one’s ego is completely destroyed in self-realization.

In the separated state, we identify with our mental self-image. Some people think the separated state is the state of identification with the body, but it’s not true. Such descriptions come from a realized state, yes, but not from complete realization (see below). If that was true, people would never say “I have a body”, they would only say “I am the body”. But for most people, “I have a body” is a much more natural thing to say. So this “I”, which “has” a body, this idea of yourself doesn’t actually exist anywhere but in your mind, and it’s your mental identity, your self-image. This identity corresponds to the “bull” in the famous Ten Bulls pictures of Zen. There are all kinds of clinging to what type of person you are or should be, how life should be for you, how others should treat you, what is “good” and “bad”, “right” and “wrong” etc. This is the separated state. Most people are in this state and they recognize and relate to each other’s egos.

In self-realization, this identity is seen to be false. One’s identity then moves to Consciousness, Love, Being, God. One basically becomes love itself as the ultimate witness of Existence. Everything is beautiful, there’s joy everywhere, and tons of compassion to other sentient beings that haven’t yet realized the simple truth of life that everything is love. This is sometimes called God Consciousness, and it’s the state of a Bodhisattva, or Jesus Christ. It’s also referred to as “loving awareness”, or Reality/Consciousness/Bliss, Sat-Chit-Ananda. This is Atman, the soul. Osho’s “the death of the ego is the birth of the soul” refers to this state. In the Ten Bulls, it corresponds to #7, “The Bull Transcended”. Sayings like “I am not my body”, “you are me” come from this place. There is no doer, Being moves you. There’s still clinging to Being, to life, to love and beauty at this state. This is “I am”, the beginning of non-duality. It is possible to recognize someone in this state since he embodies unconditional love.

But underneath all that love and beauty there’s still pain, hatred and the fear of non-existence. So, in what is most often called enlightenment, even this identity is seen to be false, and so the identity moves to Brahman, the totality of all existence. Atman and Brahman are seen to be one. This identity is way beyond the manifested consciousness, it is unmanifest. This is the state of non-Being, Buddhahood, complete aloneness. Sayings like “I am nothing” come from this place. Maharishi’s “where can I go, I am always here” also comes from this place. There is no love, no beauty here, just emptiness, Shunyata, because only ugliness can remember beauty and only hatred can remember love. As nothingness, one becomes infinite. All emotion is transcended here. One is completely at peace with his fate to dissolve into nothingness from which one has appeared. This is sometimes called the Cosmic Consciousness, the ultimate level of consciousness. In the Ten Bulls, it corresponds to #8, “Both Bull and Self Transcended”, an empty circle. There is no doer, things just happen. It is sometimes called The Absolute, but it’s not The Absolute. There is still a subtle clinging to non-Being, to infinity, and to death at this state. This is “I’m not”, the deepest state of non-duality. It becomes very hard to recognize someone at this state because only a subtle hint of ego remains here and it’s very hard to relate to such person.

But that’s also not all, because the identity of Brahman is also a false identity. Once it is seen, Being and non-Being, manifest and unmanifest are seen to be one. There is no more clinging to life as one truly accepted death, and there is no more clinging to death as a subtle hope that some experience of Brahmanic bliss lies beyond it. This is The Absolute. In the Ten Bulls, it corresponds to #9, “Reaching the Source”. Osho called it “beyond enlightenment” and described it as “my body and my Spirit are finally one”. In Hinduism, they sometimes refer to it as Para Brahman. Euphoria of existence and emptiness of non-existence merge together. Nothing can be said about this state, because this is when one becomes completely, utterly ordinary again. There’s only life, exactly as it is, in its absolute such-ness without either overwhelming love and beauty nor personal detachment of a witness. The identity finally moves to where it belongs - to the body. One is simply his body as all other animals are. The human condition is transcended. This is the end of non-duality and infinity, one becomes finite again. Nothing that doesn’t exist in the physical world, including Brahman, exists anymore. One becomes the doer again, just rid of all the illusions of life. This is what the last picture in the Ten Bulls, “Return to Society” is about. This is Enlightenment. It is strictly impossible to recognize someone at this state, because his identity is his body and everyone has a body. Even people at various stages of non-duality can’t relate to such a person, and he appears completely ignorant to them.

In the words of Kabir, “self-realization is when the dew drops into the ocean and you can’t find it anymore; in enlightenment the ocean drops back into the dewdrop and you can’t find the ocean anymore”.

Of course, not everyone’s unfolding of the dream will be linear as I described it here, and mine wasn’t either. It can be a messy process, but all of that will become obvious in due time if you go through it till the end. The lesson, as usual, is not to cling to anything newly found and always be willing to go deeper and deeper into the truth of your nature, the state of the ultimate relaxation, the ultimate let go.

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Is it aloof to feel enlightened? I wasn't looking for enlightment, I didn't even hear about it before I felt it.

Sam Sara, exoterically esoteric

Answered Apr 8, 2017

No, quite the opposite, particularly if it jumped you in dark alley. Enlightenment, the recognition of indivisibility, is not experienced as an achievement if it is experienced authentically. It is rather like walking in on your grandparents going at it like rabbits. There is the feeling that you’ve apprehended something that so deeply undermines your own worldview you can’t help but feel a bit like, “Woah, I shouldn’t have gone there.”

The recognition of indivisibility is the great psychological repression that underlines all other psychological repressions. It is not something to which we all should be aiming, like the holy site at the end of a pilgrimage. Rather, it is the dirty little secret of humanity, the avoidance of which is the animating force behind basically everything that we do.

It is for this reason that, historically, when somebody popped up who had seen the true nature of experience in a deep way, they would often end up being chastised or executed. Human societies simply cannot stand people like this, because we feel too accused by their purity. They don’t confirm all our neuroses, and so cause us to face those ugly parts of ourselves we’d rather not face. Plus, they’re easy to scapegoat and marginalise because they make no attempt conform to the existing power structures in any meaningful way.

However, we do respect the honesty and integrity of these people, and this is how religions are founded. We can’t stand the ambiguous mix of resentment and respect we feel for the enlightened individual, so we execute them horribly and then form a religion about them. We can cope with the image, but not the reality, because the latter can’t be controlled.

The reason why Zen Buddhism is so wise is because it emphasises ‘staying cool’ post-realisation. The ideal Zen person is a bit of a scoundrel. He or she plays the human game with considerable enthusiasm, but does so in such a way that they never get too suckered into it, and so never causes lasting damage. He’s like that inappropriate uncle who often drinks too much and says the naughty stuff that everybody else is thinking, but has that warm ‘what you see is what you get’ quality that people respect. The sincere asshole always causes less trouble than the insincere do-gooder.

The martyr very often makes a mess that is a bitch to clean up. Just look at all the trouble Jesus Christ caused. If only Jesus had been trained in Zen…

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Why has Advaita Vedanta gained so much more popularity in the West than any other product of Hinduism?

Edg Duveyoung, I have studied Advaita Vedanta for 50 years

Answered May 26, 2017

Because it’s Kali Yuga, baby!

Everywhere erroring unerringly harrying us. Nowhere to run. No peace in the manifest that satiates the soul’s thirst for the elixir of the mystical. Advaita’s the one sure method that works for everyone no matter how low their level of spirituality. All the other spiritual offers are harder to apply to the cacophony most folks call “my mind.” Most folks have an orchestra tuning up for a performance that never gets started, and the strings still diss the woodwinds.

It used to be otherwise. Once, a single almost-divine intent would send a shiver throughout creation. Not could — would. Even the stones were singing hymns as ancient as hydrogen. God was fairly obvious. It was not a problem knowing what to do and to love doing it.

And then, it came to pass that folks weren’t so able in the divine intent department, and they had to do rituals and such to get themselves attuned to the divine enough to inspire an entire lifetime of a streaming of consciousness that produced “righteousness enough” to have a fairly decent culture with most folks gladly walking sacred lines.

Later, as time dimmed the light, it became quite hard to run a nervous system and to protect it from every manner of tilting. Whole hunks of life had to be dedicated to righteous actions to purify a nervous system, but a rigorous discipline could steady a mind’s evolution, and in ashrams and temples and churches these minds could still be found on a regular basis.

And now, in this Age, the light is seen but through a glass darkly. There are no gods afoot. No saints pepper our lives. The appetites, the fervor, the mind so imprintable, we stumble in the jumble of modernity. Nothing succors and all know something is missing.

In the face of this, the truest of religions regularly fail to spiritually inspire their flocks to live a sacred life.

A life of working like an organ grinder’s monkey for a tossed coin pretty much exhausts a nervous system. Add the other life stresses, and what you get is, well, look around, look anywhere, look in a mirror. See?

But God is merciful. The best was saved for last.

When all hope is lost. When faith is mostly fakery. When no one can take a vow and MEAN IT. When one’s next thought is always a crap shoot. When there’s just no time for any kind of spiritual program, and none of them work well unless THOUSANDS OF HOURS are invested. Well, has God got a deal for you.

Look within. That’s the only light left in the cosmic dark. Your truth within is awareness. You are awareness, but you’ve only glanced at your self. But note — look — see? Nothing stops you from knowing you. You’re there.

It’s that easy to turn. With a glance you see your seeingness.

And as your glances turn to gazing, you’ll find that peace the world ran out of about 5,000 years ago. A peace that passeth all understanding……and misunderstanding too, but of course, just sayin’.

By paying attention to attention as one’s spiritual practice, the nervous system gets used to quieting down. This is how easy it is. Close the eyes. Spend time within with what is between thoughts

And transcend when you least expect it.

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