Sunday, December 25, 2016

The only sin

The only sin is ignorance of the Self. To lose sight of the Self is to get trapped in duality and fear.

Saturday, December 24, 2016

Excerpt~~ Void and suffering

The root cause of human suffering

In the most private spaces of each person's inner conscious life, a deep dissatisfaction is lurking, a nagging sense that life is somehow out of kilter, misaligned, not quite as it should be.
No matter how rich or secure or successful a person may be, a fundamental dissatisfaction still persists. The reasons for that dissatisfaction are plain. Everything a human being hopes for is in some sense imperfect, disappointing, or hollow. In the end we all die, which is the ultimate disappointment.
At the same time, surely there are things that every person, no matter how poor or wretched, can be sincerely grateful for. Some things bring more joy than pain, even if the joy is tinged with grief, and even if those things are lost at death.
To renounce desire is not a humane response to the fundamental dissatisfaction, even if the pursuit of desire really were the cause of pain and frustration. It seems that a characteristic of all living things is that they grasp relentlessly after survival and opportunity.
Many human needs are rooted in biology. Those obviously shouldn't be denied or trivialized. Pain is a fact. We feel pain or grief from loss. Desire is part of what makes us vital.
In any case, disassociating from desire can never actually relieve suffering, because the presence of pain and the lack of pleasure are not what causes suffering.
First of all, pain is not necessarily a synonym for suffering. We can't deny or escape pain, but we can be free from suffering by changing how we relate to the fundamental dissatisfaction.
The fundamental dissatisfaction is an unquenchable thirst that is a side effect of human cognition itself, due to being sentient in the physical world.
We can conceive of a perfectly round circle or a perfectly straight line, but those never exist in the physical world. Nothing in the physical world ever lines up exactly with our inner concepts. How we respond to the experience of that misalignment is what matters.
The mistake that leads to suffering is the simple delusion that the fundamental dissatisfaction can be extinguished by gaining more pleasure or feeling less pain or, in other words, by getting more of what we want.
The root cause of suffering is that we unrelentingly struggle to get rid of the fundamental dissatisfaction by means of the fulfillment of our desires, and yet that dissatisfaction sticks to us as a perpetual, unanswerable craving.
It can be difficult to realize that the fundamental dissatisfaction even exists, because it is veiled by our restless struggle to get rid of it. Once we realize that it exists, we're too horrified to accept that it really is unquenchable.
Paradoxically, by facing the emptiness and by surrendering completely to its inevitability, we come to deep peace and no longer suffer.

Michael Webb, April, 2006

Sunday, December 18, 2016

The monster inside

There is a monster inside me. A monster made up up of (fear+anxiety+malice). It has a desire to harm and cause pain to others. And then get terrified. It is terrified of the world.

A combination of terror and hatred. The dark one inside the mind. The one playing the game of survival. Who desires to destroy all that is perceived as a threat and living in terror of being destroyed.

I don't know what to do to it other than letting it be seen because I am very good at hiding it.

Saturday, December 10, 2016

Serenity

Serenity lies only in the realization that all shall pass. Only the real remains untouched.
Be centered at all times. Even at the cost of death.

Sunday, November 27, 2016

Heresy

Sometimes, there is desire to commit heresy. To let out the serpents and dragons of destruction to consume the world. Nothing shall remain.

What remains and what passes away? All the words and creations arise and fade only to arise again. There is nothing here that is substantial. There is no beginning and no end. Utter emptiness.

Facing the fear

Loss is painful. Fear is terrifying. Life is unpredictable.Changes in life can be quite unsettling, leaving us feeling empty. The truth can be terrifying. We distract ourselves in order to avoid seeing the truth. But the truth does not go away.

The truth destroys everything that is false. Sometimes we take pleasure in false things. In false beliefs. We do not want to lose them. Hence we avoid the truth. But you will lose everything that is false. Only truth lasts. In fact, the false has never really existed. So it cannot be lost.

If you really consider it, your deepest fear and most secret wish are identical and is already true.

Wednesday, November 2, 2016

Decision making

There is absolutely no basis for making any decision. When you are presented with two options and none of them matters, which one do you choose? All our choices in life are like this. This causes agitation in the mind.

Often, you start regretting the moment you make a particular choice, wondering whether you made the right choice. What really is the right choice? The question "Did I make the right choice" torments the mind.

And the mind keeps echoing the regret. What is the origin of choice? What is choice? This question can be pondered eternally because it has no answer. Where did the pink unicorn come from? You can speculate this question for eternity and ultimately is nothing but mental entertainment. Questions are fuel for the mind. Without questions, the mind disappears. Questions keep the mind alive.

When all questions subside, only that which is remains.

Friday, October 28, 2016

SInking into darkness

The mind is capable of sinking into unimaginable depths of degradation. And there is a perverse pleasure that it gets from that. It is capable of getting addicted to barbaric acts of torture and cruelty and its ability to inflict suffering is immense. The reason why the mind falls into degradation is to escape the inherent emptiness of life. It seeks to fill itself with total perversion and degradation. And it keeps going deeper. And all the falls into degradation leave behind an impression on the mind stuff. This is the price of falling into perversion.

There is simply no way out without deep repentance and prayer. May the perversions and darkness of the mind be released.

When the mind sinks into darkness, it gets pulled further in and is unable to appreciate the simple pleasures of life, seeking instead only greater degrees of perversions. This becomes a vicious circle and one ultimately becomes a beast.

May the darkness be enlightened. Grace alone can remove the darkness.

Saturday, October 22, 2016

Why seek?

What is it that keeps us forever seeking? What is this drive to strive higher? What is this deep fear of degrading?

The only way to overcome fear is to look clearly into the heart of things. Solitude and melancholy marinate the soul. Clearing the waste. Getting rid of the junk. Clarity is not something to be attained, but getting rid of all that is clouding the vision.

To be at ease with your soul. To know that you know. Getting in touch with your soul.

Just let it be. Clarity is inherent. The natural state. Peace.

Saturday, October 15, 2016

Certainty

To attain mastery over something is an arduous journey. There are many false alarms on the way. Perhaps the biggest obstacle to mastery is the belief that you have already mastered.
The biggest obstacle to knowledge is the belief that you already know.

Is there anything that is absolutely certain.

1. There is something here. Something seems to be happening. And this is known.
2. I know I exist.
3. What I am I do not know. But that existence exists and knows it exists.

Only this is certain. What is seen around, I have no idea. From where do sounds arise I have no idea. From where do thoughts arise I have no idea. From where do I arise I have no idea.

There is only existence knowing that it exists.

Movement is continuous.

What causes motion is unknown.

Existence exists as movement. But is inherently absolutely still.

Information is endless. And continuously changing. It cannot be understood. Because the cause of information is unknown.

We can only 'learn' social conventions and mechanisms. The nature of existence is unknown.

All learning is only of conventions and methodologies. True knowledge is the knowing of existence.

To lead a peaceful life, all that is needed is to avoid folly. To question every assumption. To become aware of the follies of life. Of self deception. Of unquestioned beliefs.

Confusion arises from being caught up in details and is an endless loop. Clarity is inherent. Confusion is created.

Lack of self control leads to confusion. Less is more.

Clarity is knowing emptiness.

Is that which is incompetent?

Saturday, October 8, 2016

One wish

If I had one wish, it would be to choose the time of my death.

The great secret

In order to be worthy of receiving the deepest secret of life, you must be willing to walk head on into your greatest fear.

Friday, October 7, 2016

Resentment

Self hatred or resentment is the worst feeling. It happens when you are not true to yourself and allow yourself to be influenced by outside factors. There is something that absolutely loathes being subject to external constraints and psychological manipulation.

The only true way to live a sane life is to be true to yourself, whatever the cost. You cannot allow yourself to fall prey to psychological manipulation. Else you will develop self hatred. Let us pray that the soul come out of the slime of deep resentment and break the psychological shatters and shine the light of truth upon itself.

Friday, September 30, 2016

Pleasures of life

I was just thinking about the pleasures of life. All the little pleasures.
The conclusion is nothing beats a good nights sleep!

Sleep is bliss. (And the moments just before sleep and after waking up)

Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Thoughts cover the sky

The mind is filled with thoughts. These thoughts are like the cloud which cover the sky. A dark thought is like a dark cloud which allows less light to enter. A light thought sis like a white cloud which does not obstruct much light. However, all thoughts, no matter the content, are like obstructions and cannot be relied upon. What is actually there cannot be spoken about, commented or thought but is the only thing that exists.

It does not matter whether you get it or not, as it is already the case.

Monday, September 12, 2016

A perfect moment

Past memories bubble up to the surface of consciousness. A few moments where a feeling of great wonder arose. What is it about life that creates moments of utter wonder. Unexpectedly, it arrives and you find yourself in a perfect moment.

The world is a play of consciousness. Consciousness is movement. To find a moment of stillness in the incessant movement of consciousness is wonderful.

Saturday, September 10, 2016

The pull of darkness

The chief obstacle to seeing awareness is negative tendencies. The negative tendencies/emotions and dark imaginings are powerful obstacles which render you blind to the true nature of things.

All negative tendencies are rooted in dark imaginings. Dark thoughts/malice/sadistic thoughts/thoughts of violence/rape/brutal sex/animal indulgences/thoughts of filth/guttural visions/sexual incest/sexual violence/forbidden sexual and violent indulgences/desire to cause pain are tendencies which have a vice like grip on the subconscious regions of the mind. These hold power over the mind, pervert the intellect and make it almost impossible to see the truth.

Dark imaginings are therefore your chief temptation. Why do we have these dark imaginings. Sometimes the mind seeks escape. As you become aware, you become aware of suffering, misery and the general pain of life. In order to escape the pain, you can either rise higher or fall lower. Dark imaginings are always a form of escape from pain. Sometimes, the pain that we carry is relieved by dark imaginings which offer the prospect of release. However, it comes at a cost. It completely blinds you to truth and leads you further into bondage. It binds you through addiction and then it becomes difficult to leave. It extinguishes the light. We take to the dark path to escape from pain, but it completely consumes.

When you go down the dark path, your intellect is perverted/corrupted and understanding disappears. All that you crave is greater darkness. Because it seems to release the pain temporarily. But it eventually leads to total despair. Like a craving that seeks immediate relief, the dark path takes you deeper into darkness.

It is the subconscious that harbors our dark tendencies, making it invisible to our conscious minds. Inside the subconscious, it lurks unseen and then when you are tired or your conscious mind control weakens, it arrives suddenly and performs its havoc and you are left wondering what happened.

Hence the need to be always vigilant. Only by grace when all the darkness is fully dispelled are you really liberated. As long as there is darkness, liberation is not possible. And darkness cannot be destroyed without light. Pray for light. Pray that the entire world is enlightened so that the darkness inside the subconscious is fully removed.

Darkness also has its role therefore. It allows us to start appreciating the normal. Great effort is required to resist the pull of darkness. Especially in times of great loss, the pull of darkness seems too much to resist. We can only pray that the light protects us in times of weakness. Invoke the Mother. She will protect you from darkness.

Nature of experience

There is no world to experience. Although you imagine that you are having experiences, the truth is that reality is experiencing itself.

Since non duality is the nature, there is only the One experiencing itself at all times. Due to the superimposition of images, it is believed that an individual is experiencing the world. However, there is only consciousness experiencing itself.

Awareness aware that is is aware. That is all. Nothing else is there.

Wednesday, September 7, 2016

What the fuck?

What is the most important but least urgent in life?

 I don't know what is most important in life. The word important needs to be carefully  used. The careless usage of words leads only to confusion.

No matter how hard you try to avoid it, you will lose. You will fail. You will get conned.

All your writings are ultimately useless.

The mind keeps changing. Priorities keep changing. Life is just a game. Get married!

Shit the fuck and fuck the shit. Boldness speaks volumes.

Get married you bastard. Fuck everything else. Death is already pursuing you. The mind is purely selfish. What you think is best for you is generally not so.

Fuck the girl and shit the food. There is nothing else here to gain.


Sunday, August 21, 2016

Too good to be true

Sometimes, you just want to believe in things that are too good to be true. Sometimes you just want to believe fantasy. And that is how you get conned.

Nothing that is worth having comes easy in life. To believe otherwise will only lead you into getting conned.

Monday, August 15, 2016

Noticing the unnoticed

A thought struck me today.

There are scores of people/animals/insects etc whose presence is continuously unnoticed. Esppecially, the unassuming ones are rarely noticed. By not noticing the vast unassuming majority of life forms/people, our perception of the world is heavily biased and hence warped and deluded.

Your perception of the world is most likely warped and this makes you highly susceptible to deception/manipulation/trickery. Realize that you are always at a disadvantage by virtue of the focus of your attention on a miniscule fraction of the world and life.

Try to control the world or exert your will and you will fail simply because your are blind. Without clear sight, no amount of willpower is going to save you. Hence first learn to notice. That's all you really need to do. Notice the unnoticed. Noticing what is consistently missed is wisdom and genius.

Come out of your small little world of focused attention and start defocusing and noticing. You will be amazed at what you find.

Saturday, August 6, 2016

The rearest treasure

The greatest treasure is a clear mind. It is the original state. No worldly wealth can compare.


Saturday, July 30, 2016

Suffering

Losing sight of the big picture and acting impulsively based on a momentary instinct leads to suffering.

All regret over past mistakes affects you when you dwell on it repeatedly.

Foolish actions are committed when you momentarily lose sight of the big picture. This causes suffering.

Inability to see things as they are leads to suffering.

Tuesday, July 5, 2016

Truth and freedom

What is the only thing that matters? Its knowing without doubt that you are un-limited.
Knowing that limitations are only mental creations and not actual realities.

To be truly convinced of your own freedom without a doubt is the only happiness there is. The antidote to fear.

Even in death and loss and physical pain, your are never limited. Knowing that you are not limited is the only knowing there is. Once this is known, nothing else is relevant.

Hence the only important task is to ceaselessly inquire as to who you really are. Keep inquiring until you are convinced. This is your only task.

Providing value to others is basically driven by fear. You think providing value to others ensures your survival with minimum discomfort.

The only real value you can provide is to convince yourself of your own limit-less-ness. Otherwise, the value that you provide is only through deception.

The art of manipulation

I hate it. I just gave away $3000 for a vacuum cleaner!!!
The mind was clouded by emotion and manipulated into parting with $3000!

Here's how:

1. Accepted a free gift of two containers at a shopping mall by signing up for a free demo. (Accepted free gift...first mistake)
2. Was unaware of the intention of the free demo was to actually push a trained salesman into your room.
3. Watched the demo and got convinced by the salesman's arguments on the amount of dust collected.
4. Allowed the salesman to manipulate the mind using fear of ill health, caused by dust allergy.
5. Fell for the subtle trick of relativity, where the salesman made the price of $3000 appear temporarily lower. Deception of relativity can make even $100,000 appear small and $1 appear huge.
6. Being continually pushed by the salesman created doubt in the mind. Fear of loss was activated.
7. Eventually a situation was reached where rationality was lost and the mind lost its ability to discriminate and decide.
8. The pressure from doubt along with the vanishing of discrimination and the desire for temporary relief from the grilling of the salesman resulted in the words 'okay' escaping the mouth.
9. This sealed the deal at which point I immediately realized the consequence of the fall and it was too late to reverse.

Lesson learnt:

1. Never accept free gifts
2. Never be good or polite to salesman
3. Need to develop distrust and ruthlessness
4. Stick to principles at all costs

Sunday, July 3, 2016

Life and wealth

The enormous value that we place over wealth and relationships is what lies at the root of the fear of death. One who is wealthy and has good relationships is soon attached to them and fears losing it. Find out instead what life is.

Is this enough?

What is life? What is contentment? Is it possible to live without fear? Is it possible to experience absolute contentment for even an instant? The sense of having no more wants?

It seems as though at every instant, there is this background of incessant dissatisfaction. A sense that things are somehow not right. A sense that change will come. Change makes it impossible to remain satisfied.

Today your situation is one way. Tomorrow it will be another. What then can one rely on? Death is continuously stalking.

Fear of poverty, of illness of being left alone, of dependency dominate the recesses of the mind. How does one guarantee the stability of any emotional state.

Certain thought trains have enormous influence on your well being. Certain intense thoughts keep playing over and over again. There seems to be no relief from these intense thought trains. What fuels these thought trains? What fuels regret? The expectation that things could somehow be different. The belief that things could somehow be different had you made a different choice. The belief that things as they stand at this moment should not be this way. The belief that you could have acted differently in the 'past'.

That which matters cannot be affected by any action, past present or future. Certain variable interact among themselves and an 'action' is performed. Who is the performer of these actions? Who is the thinker of thoughts?

Saturday, July 2, 2016

The costliest mistake

Foolishness is the costliest thing in the world.
One moment of a foolish decision can cost you a lifetime of merit.

Just an instant of foolishness, an instant loss of discrimination, a moment of loss of rationality is enough to destroy the gain of lifetimes.

All the dedicated efforts of a lifetime can be lost in a single instant of foolishness. Only intelligent discrimination can protect from foolishness.

Thus, pray for protection from foolishness and blindness. The only protection that is required.

The only protection that is needed is from foolishness.

Foolishness = Blindness = Ignorance

Friday, June 24, 2016

The I is God

What is this world and who am I?

The I is the light that is ever shining and all revealing.

Looking within, all that is found is the I. The I is God.

God is all there is.

Monday, June 20, 2016

Raw energy of life

So many desires and torrents gushing underneath. So many primal animal instincts. There lurks within us a hungry beast, a beast that wishes to devour. To have violent sex. There lurks in the dark a primal violence.

This is nothing but the raw energy of life. This energy is the movement of life and needs to be channeled into an outlet. It cannot remain still. You need to work with it. Channel it. Not repress it. Else it will get perverse.

Saturday, June 18, 2016

The good life

Lets imagine for a moment the best thing that could happen.

The best thing that could happen is that I become fully financially independent i.e. don't need to worry about money the rest of my life and share my life with people I love where we have mutual love for each other and have a life free of illness.

That my parents have a peaceful retired life and that the entire universe stays happy.

And the realization of God does not leave at any time. I wish this for all creatures.

1. God realization at all times (No deceptions)

2. Illness free (No physical and mental pain)

3. Share life with loved ones (No loneliness)

4. Financially independent (No worldly concerns)




Sunday, June 5, 2016

Know only this

The only thing that needs to be understood is what is real.

The core identity has to be realized and lived. Only this is important.

Only the real matters. All that is other than real is irrelevant.

Control the mind. The only discipline is to control the mind. When the mind slows down, clarity is revealed as the only reality.

"God alone is Real. All else illusory" - Ramakrishna Paramhansa

Only this needs to be realized without doubt. With every cell in the body, the truth has to be realized. Then alone will conflicts and misery cease.

Unless the truth is realized, no peace is possible in a million lifetimes.

The greatest action that can be performed is to enable another to realize the truth for himself. The only real service.

Saturday, June 4, 2016

Remembering spirit

Living life, a normal ordinary life itself is challenging. Unforeseen situations can occur. Stability of mind is the most important requirement. Your partner needs to be calm and stable too. There are dark recesses in the mind. These can expand into depression.

Remember awareness. The body is an abode of disease. The mind too can be infected. The spirit is purity and cannot be touched by impurity.


Friday, May 20, 2016

Simplicity

Simplicity is most valuable. It takes self control to remain simple. Simplicity is mainly about eliminating the noise. Life is simple. To keep it that way takes self control. It is very tempting to be carried away by complexities. Simplicity is knowing without doubt.

Knowing that you know is simplicity.

Saturday, April 30, 2016

Clarity in the midst of noise

A moment of clarity in the midst of all the noise of life is the most precious gift.
It creates a deep impression on memory.

To be at home in solitude is bliss.

Recapitulation

Ok, so things have changed.

I have a job now! And my oral defense is over. Finishing that which you began is a sweet feeling. Because nothing matters eventually, there is no point being afraid to act.

Contemplate. When you know you can have anything you desire, the motivation to pursue desire diminishes.

Solitude does not mean to avoid being with people, but the realization that there is no other.

Saturday, March 5, 2016

Self observation

Some flaws:

1. See others as potential competitors. Hence try to hide information from them.
2. Need to win over others. Try to beat them. Only appear to co-operate on the surface.
3. Secretly despise others by harboring hatred and ill will.

There is no 'self' to be liberated from.

All defects and virtues belong to the non-existent self.

Monday, February 22, 2016

Fall from grace

Fall from grace. The great story of life.
Sometimes, in life, in spite of everything, we fall.

The nicest guy can become a criminal.
The most honest guy can lie.

What is it that causes the fall from grace? Maybe self interest.

I was so proud about the fact that I always speak the truth. So much so that I started believing that whatever I say will come true. Then suddenly I lied. And the fall was excruciatingly painful.

Now I do not wish for any sort of power over the truth. I embrace my human weakness.
I have lied and cheated. And I forgive myself and forgive you for all your secret evil acts.

No matter how long you have been honest, a single lie can completely shatter everything instantaneously. Hence the desire to be good is the root of misery. The shadow cannot be destroyed.

In order to keep life simple, just avoid lying. Period.

Yes, you may fall sometime, but come back onto the path. Forgive yourself and come back home.

Lying and its consequence

The consequences of lying are instantaneous. Instantly, darkness falls on the mind and a heaviness is felt.
You don't feel good. Subconscious impression is made.

Truly, it doesn't help to lie. Especially to lie intentionally. Today, I lied intentionally.
And I swear it doesn't feel good afterwards.

Truly, its not worth lying even if telling the truth puts you into slight inconvenience.

Else, always stick to truth. Lying sucks. Believe me. Even lying to your enemy sucks.

Saturday, February 20, 2016

What to do?

What is to be done? What is to be avoided?
The two endless questions.

The divine intent is forever active. Let it decide the course of action.
No need for resistance.

Gold is shaped into a ring. If it identifies as the ring, it will always be afraid of losing its identity or getting damaged. If it realizes its true identity as gold, it 'becomes' indestructible immediately.

Thursday, February 18, 2016

Reality of the absolute

Awareness exists only in opposition to unawareness.
Being exists only relative to non being.

No matter how hard you try, you cannot escape the opposites. Because outside of the world of opposites, nothing exists that can be known or thought about.

That which is can only be in opposition to that which is not. Death can be only in opposition to birth.
Similarly, time and non time etc.

The only way out is the absolute. All relatives are conceptual. Only the absolute alone is real.

The absolute is neither aware nor unaware. Since awareness and unawareness give rise to each other.


Saturday, February 13, 2016

Choice and misery

That causing most turmoil is the notion of choice. The possibility of making the wrong choice drives the mind insane. Imagine a life ruined by wrong choices. Is the person responsible?

What factor inspires the respective choice? We have no idea of the exact consequences of a choice. Sometimes, we regret making a choice. But, we have no idea of our state had we made the other choice. For example, sometimes no matter what you choose you will regret it.

Choice is both your greatest blessing and your greatest curse. Ultimately, the wise ones see that all choice is an illusion. To realize this is peace.

Friday, February 12, 2016

Choice

Let us consider the question of choice and free will.

Say you are in a position where you have to choose between two possibilities A and B.
Assume you chose B. Now was this really a free choice?

On the surface, it seems as though you chose B out of your own free will. However, notice that in the act of evaluating the choices, your subconscious invariably brings out past memories related to the choices A and B. These past impressions cannot be ignored while in the process of choosing. Also, the state of mind you are in at the moment of choosing matters. What are the imagined consequences of choosing either A or B? And then comes moments where the forces that govern our lives bring circumstances to the point wherein the choice gets made. The variables in question are simply too many to factor out and the interrelations among them result in the making of the choice.

So, what factor ultimately makes the choice? Notice that your mind is a container of various impressions or programs. These programs run your daily life. Sometimes they cause joy. More often pain. Our lives are not ours alone but influenced by those we come in contact with. It is these complex intermingling of impressions that create decisions and a self is created as the owner of the decision. A self is fabricated to claim ownership of all choices and decisions. This is done merely to make things simple. Thoughts can easily be implanted in the mind which can create anguish. The only way out is to give up hope or desire.

In this sometimes ruthless battle of cause and effect, of opposing forces of light and dark, is there an absolute truth? There is seeming choice.

The play of impressions is the factor governing life. There only seems to be choice.

Sunday, February 7, 2016

Reveal and be free

Conflicting tendencies cause confusion and you end up making the 'wrong' choice.
For example: Today I bumped into a friend while alighting a bus. One part was happy to see him. Another part wanted to hide my visit to the place I was coming from. And I ended up not meeting him. And then I was tormented by guilt for refusing to meet him.

Why did I want to hide my previous visit? Why am I trying to hide my activities?
They invariably lead to situations where revealing them become inevitable. Why indulge in this tiring game of hide and seek and instead just have the courage to reveal, whatever the consequence. This will save a lot of regret, guilt or just energy.

So don't try to hide stuff. No need to go around parading your activities either. However, when the moment demands, reveal it. Do not stubbornly try to hide.

Saturday, February 6, 2016

Dealing with illness

Dealing with illness is one of life's greatest challenge. Facing illness implies facing loss of health and also death. It automatically causes you to shed most of your mundane concerns and learn to appreciate life itself. Illness is a call to look inward. A call to introspect. Go within and realize the deathless. The soul cannot be sick. No illness can affect the soul.

Illness affects the body. Identification with body results in severe suffering due to illness. The only way out is to be convinced of the deathless dimension of consciousness. Consciousness is untouched by illness. To deeply realize this is true healing.

May you be healed.

Friday, January 15, 2016

THE FINAL WORDS OF PADMASAMBHAVA


Homage to the master.

Lady Tsogyal of Kharchen served the nirmanakaya Orgyen Padmakara from her eighth year, accompanying him like a shadow follows a body. When the master was about to leave Tibet for the land of the rakshas, I, Lady Kharchen, having offered a mandala of gold and turquoise and having arranged a tantric feast, a wheel of gathering, implored:
Great master! You are leaving to tame the rakshas. I am left behind here in Tibet. Although I have served you for a long time, master, this old woman has no confidence about the time of death. So I beseech you to kindly give me an instruction condensing all teachings into one, which is concise and easy to practice.

The great master replied: Devoted one with a faithful and virtuous mind, listen to me. Although there are many profound key points of body, rest free and relaxed as you feel comfortable. Everything is included in simply that.

Although there are many key points of speech such as breath control and mantra recitation, stop speaking and remain like a mute. Everything is included in simply that. Although there are many key points of mind such as concentrating, relaxing, projecting, dissolving and focusing inward, everything is included in simply letting it rest in its natural state, free and easy, without fabrication. But the mind doesn’t remain quietly in that state.

You may wonder, is mind nothing? It still shimmers and flashes forth, like haze in the heat of the sun. You may wonder, is it something? It has no color or shape to identify it but is utterly empty and completely awake. That is the nature of your mind. Having recognized it as such, to become certain about it, that is the view. To remain undistracted in the state of stillness, without fabrication or fixation, that is the meditation. In that state, to be free from clinging or attachment, accepting or rejecting, hope or fear, towards any of the experiences of the six senses, that is the conduct.
Whatever doubt or hesitation occurs, mentally call on your master for help. Don’t remain in places of ordinary people, practice in seclusion. Give up your clinging to whatever you are most attached to as well as to whomever you have the strongest bond with in this life, and practice. Like that, although your body remains in human form, your mind is equal to the buddhas’.

At the time of dying, you should practice as follows. When the earth element dissolves into water, the body becomes heavy and cannot support itself. When the water element dissolves into fire, the mouth and nose dry up. When the fire element dissolves into wind, body heat disappears. When the wind element dissolves into consciousness, you cannot but exhale with a rattle and inhale with a gasp. Next you feel as if being pressed down by a huge mountain, being trapped within darkness, or being dropped into the expanse of space. All these experiences are accompanied by thunderous and ringing sounds. The whole sky is vividly bright like an unfurled brocade.

Now within a dome of rainbow lights the natural forms of your mind, the peaceful, wrathful, semi-wrathful deities and the ones with various heads begin to fill the sky. Some brandish weapons and utter “Beat! beat!” “Kill! kill!” “Hung! Hung!” “Phat! Phat!” and other fierce sounds. There is light like a hundred thousand suns shining at once. At this time, your innate deity will remind you of awareness saying, Don’t be distracted! Don’t be distracted! Your innate demon will disturb all your experiences, make them collapse and utter sharp and fierce sounds and confuse you.
At this point, know this: The feeling of being pressed down is not that of being pressed by a mountain. It is your own elements dissolving. Don’t be afraid of that! The feeling of being trapped within darkness is not a darkness. It is your five sense faculties dissolving. The feeling of being dropped into the expanse of space is not being dropped. It is your mind without support because your body and mind have separated and your breathing has stopped.

All the experiences of rainbow lights are the natural manifestations of your mind. The peaceful and wrathful forms are the natural forms of your mind. All sounds are your own sounds. All lights are your own lights. Have no doubt about that. If you do feel doubt, it throws you back into samsara. Resolve all this to be self-display, and when you then remain wide awake in luminous emptiness, simply in that you will attain the three kayas and awaken to enlightenment. Even if someone then cast you into samsara, you won’t go there.

The innate deity means undistracted presence of mind which right now arrests your thinking. From this moment, the most important point is rid this mind of hope and fear, clinging and fixation, toward the objects of your six sense faculties as well as to fascination, joy and sadness. If you already now become stable in this, you will be able to reassume your natural state in the bardo and awaken to enlightenment. The most vital point is therefore to sustain your practice undistractedly from this very moment.

The innate demon is your present tendency for ignorance, your doubt and hesitation. Whatever frightful phenomena appear at that time, such as sounds, colors and lights, don’t be fascinated, don’t doubt and don’t be afraid. Falling into doubt for even a moment, will cause you to wander into samsara, so gain complete stability.

Next you may experience the entrances to a womb in the form of celestial palaces. Don’t be attracted to them. Be certain of that! Be free from hope and fear! I swear there is no doubt that you will then become enlightened without taking further rebirths. When this happens, it is not that you are helped by a buddha, because your awareness is primordially enlightened. It is not that you can be harmed by a hell, because fixation is naturally cleared away, fear of samsara and hope for nirvana are cut from the root. Becoming enlightened can be compared to water cleared of sediments, gold cleansed of impurities or the sky cleared of clouds.

Having realized space-like dharmakaya for the benefit of oneself, you will accomplish the welfare of sentient beings as far as space pervades. Having attained sambhogakaya and nirmanakaya for the welfare of others, you will benefit sentient beings as far as your mind pervades phenomena.
If this instruction is given three times to even a great sinner such as one who has killed his own father and mother, he will not fall into samsara even if thrown there. There is no doubt about becoming enlightened. Even if you have many other profound teachings, without an instruction like this, you remain far away from enlightenment. Since you don’t know where you may wander next, practice this with perseverance.

You must give this instruction to recipients who have great faith, strong diligence and are intelligent, who always remember their teacher, who have confidence in the oral instructions, who exert themselves in the practice, who are stable-minded and able to give up concerns for this world. Give them this with the master’s seal of entrustment, the yidam’s seal of secrecy, and the dakini’s seal of entrustment.

Although I, Padmakara, have followed many masters for one thousand eight hundred years, have requested instructions, received teachings, studied and taught, meditated and practiced, I have not found any teaching more profound than this. I am going to tame the rakshas. You should practice like this. Lady, you will become enlightened in the celestial realms. Therefore persevere in this instruction.

Having spoken, the precious master mounted the rays of the sun and departed for the land of the rakshas. Following that, Lady Tsogyal attained liberation. She committed this teaching to writing and concealed it as a profound treasure. She made this aspiration: In the future, may it be given to Guru Dorje Lingpa. May it then benefit many beings.

This completes the Sacred Refined Essence Instruction, the reply to questions on self-liberation at the moment of death and in the bardo. Samaya, seal, seal, seal.

Friday, January 8, 2016

There is no truth

Confusion is the force ruling the mind. The mind keeps interpreting and reinterpreting actions. Various impressions have gathered over years making the mind heavy and turbulent.

However, so glorious that none of this drama is real. Only the self aware dream. No dreamer.

From where do I come? Was I born?

What is this great drama and who is experiencing it?

Loss and gain. What exactly is going on? All experiences like a dream. Nothing ever happens. No one is ever born. All passes as nothing has ever arisen.

No creation has ever taken place. Gaudapada was a fiction and so were his words. And so are these. To realize your personality is a fiction. There is nothing to do or undo. Nothing to hold on or let go. At all times, nothing comes into existence. What is, is. What is not, is not.

This entire dream is a partless experience.Thus, what happens is exactly what is meant to happen. There is simply no alternative. In fact, there is nothing happening at any time. Since there is no cause.

To realize that all is fiction is the end. There is no one to realize the truth. There is no truth.

Monday, January 4, 2016

Loss and mastery of life

The most important life skill is the ability to endure loss.

If you are able to endure great loss and yet remain dignified and not break apart, you will rise.

To completely embrace loss and yet keep moving is to attain mastery over life.