Emptiness

It is not the completion of a task, but the emptiness that follows completion which is important.

It is not achievement but the emptiness that follows which is important.

It is not sex but the emptiness that follows which is important.

It is not the satisfaction of desire but the emptiness that follows which is important.

Idleness

I have realized in the midst of an insanely busy life that the most important and only worthy thing in life is idleness. All that I desire now is to live a life of complete idleness after finishing my PhD.

There is nothing better than doing nothing. To enjoy the bliss of nothingness is all that I now desire.
After all this time of running around, working hard, pleasing my boss, pleasing co-workers and pleasing family, I realize that all that I really desire is to bathe in the pure bliss of nothingness.

Idleness is my ideal and idleness is all that I desire. There is no fear in idleness. Enjoy doing nothing. I am a lazy bastard! Forget all grand ambition. After my PhD, I do not desire to work anymore. The only thing that keeps me going in pursuing my PhD is the thought of complete idleness after all this craziness is finally over. I will enjoy a life of doing nothing. This is my ideal. And this ideal is what keeps me going. No more work, but pure laziness.

The zero state

Everything in the universe and in the mind has its origin in the zero state. Emptiness is what lies at the root of our existence. In this nothingness is found the absence but no one is found. We are always here in emptiness. Come back here into the void. Desire takes us outside the void. With the birth of desire arises the birth of the world from the void. The world is desire. Desire creates form. Desire creates thought. As long as the other is seen, there is misery. Supreme contentment is the absence of desire. Desire is absent in the absence of the other. Desire arises from the sense of the other.

As long as the other is seen, desire will exist. As long as desire exists, the world will exist. As long as the world exists, misery will exist.

To stop seeing the other, escape into the void. The zero state is that prior to desire. There is no one here at the zero state. To see the other is the birth of desire and the birth of misery. No peace is possible when the other is seen.

To see through the illusion of the other is to be free of desire.

Value

So what is most valuable in life? That alone is most valuable which cannot be lost. That alone is of value which neither comes nor goes. That alone is most valuable which is always here. That alone is most valuable which cannot be taken away. That alone is most valuable which cannot be given. Lovers come and go. Fame comes and goes. Achievements come and go. Success comes and goes. Wealth comes and goes. That alone is valuable which holds you. Stop. Just be quiet and look. What is here? Be still. And see. Stop desiring. What remains? Go deeper...what do you see? Who sees?
What is this mystery which lies at the very heart of existence? Which gives birth to the 'I AM'...

Dealing with Judgements

We live our lies immersed in activity and hungry for new experiences and stimulus. When we experience some deep loss, the mind can enter into a realm of dense darkness. In this state, it is incapable of seeing any positive. The state of mind which sees only darkness is a state of fear which is born from separation. We live amongst our own judgements. Our judgements of others influence our judgements of ourselves. Living in this world of judgements drains us of all vital energy. We feel lethargic and incapable of functioning effectively in this state. This coupled with panic about our own inner condition feeds on itself and leads to a complete downward spiral. Depression arrives. Despair enters. Immersed in these dark waters, we see no way out. At this moment, stop. Just stop.

Realize that all we ever have to deal with is our own mind. We do not deal with the external world, but our own judgements. Stop judging your condition. Stop judging the condition of others. This is not easy, since we are trained to judge from the moment we are born. What tires you most is the constant judgements arising in your mind. It is a tremendous wastage of vital energy. Even if you stop judging, you will be exposed to the constant judgements by other people hitting your mind. People will judge others and they will judge you. Their judgements influence your judgements. What is judgement? Judgement is the act of labelling. Judgement is nothing but the creation of names and hence duality. Being judged by others is a huge drain of vital energy. Infact, it is one of the biggest sources of energy loss. If you take the judgements thrust unto you very deeply, you will be disturbed. Judgements by your family, your boss, your colleagues, your lover and society will keep coming to you. Like a pile of garbage thrown towards you. Fear of being judged will never allow you to be at peace. In order to avoid being swept and tossed by the countless forces of the world, one must be alert and know what one values most. One must be able to see clearly through the dense clouds of mental beliefs. Underneath all your judgements and incessant thoughts and fears, lies the vast realm of silent awareness. Take refuge here. Come back here. The place prior to desire. Prior to thought. Prior to experience. Take a deep breath and at the point where your breath stops is the entry into this deep realm of vast silence. The sacred inner space which is your true home. What lies here, in this deeply mysterious realm? The realm of deep silence. Who lives here? Can anyone live here? What remains when all sounds stop? What remains when all sights fail? What remains when experience ends? What remains when the world ends? What remains when words fail?

Desire

Desire is the most fundamental force in the universe. In order for anything to be created, whether it is a universe or life experience or external circumstances, it has to first be desired. Without desire, no creation or form is possible. Within the mind, underneath all the thoughts lies the realm of desire (also known as intention and curiosity). It is here that creation begins. It is here that first thought originates. Without it, there is no achievement, no seeking, no questions, no curiosity, no attachments, no suffering. It is the force of desire that creates the multitudes of forms that we see outside. It is desire which creates a universe. To understand the mind, desire must be understood. So if desire creates the world, what then creates desire? It is the perception of separation that creates desire. A sense of something else. A sense of an 'other'. The force which drives the activity of the world is nothing but desire. Something is perceived to be lost. Something is perceived to be 'out there'. A sense of incompleteness with what is creates the urge, the drive, the motivation, the desire to seek for that which will cause completion. A sense of lack creates desire. The desire and hunger for experience, the desire for sex is all created by a sense of incompleteness.

The most powerful urge in this realm is the desire for sex. We seek sex as a means for completion. The world is driven by this most fundamental desire for sex. A most powerful force it is. This force sustains the illusion of the world. Caught in the throes of this powerful force, we are unable to see clearly. We are lost in the forest of the world. Every moment is a fight against this urge. Most desires can be traced back to this one root desire. This keeps us constricted and attached and forever seeking.

We must first see that no experience, however profound can satisfy you. Because the very search for satisfaction stems from a place of incompleteness and lack. You seek experience as a means to feel complete. There is always a sense of having missed out on some life experience. A regret over some lost opportunity to experience something. Something which will lead to salvation. The mind constantly seeks salvation. Always hungry to experience life. More of life experience. Always dissatisfied with non experience. The emptiness of this moment terrifies us. So we crave novel experiences. For how long will you engage in this senseless pursuit? Come home now. You have had enough. Be Still. Be aware. Forget the world. Forget the universe. Come back to the source. Come home to emptiness. Stop this madness. Stop this incessant drive to seek more experiences. This drive will never satisfy you. You will be always miserable and deeply discontent with this moment. Nothing is needed. No experience is needed. You are already complete. Incompletion never existed in the first place. Stop the continuous inner chatter. Stop listening to the voice in your head.

Consciousness and the world

To look outside the self is to see the world of forms. We perceive through our minds and all that the mind is capable of perceiving is forms. The world of the mind is the world of forms or mind images. The mind is incapable of seeing deeper than forms. Since we perceive through our minds, all that we are capable of doing with the mind is constructing forms. Thus, the mind cannot perceive the reality underneath the external forms. Even internally while imagining, all the mind creates are more forms. Thus, trying to understand the external world thruogh the mind is futile.

Now, underneath all forms must be the same basic substance or essence which being all there is must be in you. Thus, you are that which is contained in all forms. For a moment, close your eyes. Now the world is not seen. No 'other' thing is seen. All that remains is the consciousness of being aware or the sense of 'I Am'. This consciousness of awareness is all that remains when the world is not seen. The moment you see an 'other', desire (also called curiosity) appears and you are lost in a mental world of forms again. This consciousness of awareness is all that remains when the world is lost. In the absence of memory and the absence of identity, this is all that remains. The vast peace underlying the waves of desire. Desire creates the world. Desire is created when the other appears. The other is a form created by the mind. When the other appears, 'you the person' appear as well.

When you look into your mind which is the world, you will see many others and many forms and stories and opinions and judgements. This creates great emotional turbulence. All emotion is primarily energy. This wild movement of energy then results in restlessness. And from restlessness is born the continuous urge for activity. And then we operate from a state of ceaseless activity. Never stopping, continuously moving and unable to relax. Thus, we end up living in continuous and endless anxiety. To put an end to this, we must put and end to the mind made world of forms. We must stop seeing the other and start noticing the consciousness of awareness in moments when our sense input into the mind is reduced, especially from the eyes. All questions can only arise when others are seen. When there is no other, and consciousness alone is, what question can possibly be. For an all-pervading consciousness which does not identify itself with any form, what else can possibly be. No questions. No answers.

But when the world is seen, this complex multitude of forms, there is no end to the questions. No end to anxiety. And fear will rule. To see the physical body is the birth of identity. Lost in body consciousness, one is gripped by the world of forms. And is constantly threatened by all other forms. And one is unable to perceive truly.