Troubled by other people

One thing has been realized.
I just cannot like 'other people'

No matter what, the existence of 'other people' has caused tremendous misery.
It is impossible to like others.

But no matter how much you dislike others, your dislike affects no one but yourself. This is extremely difficult to accept. Why cant my dislike result in their destruction?

Who are these 'other people'? And who dislikes them?

Remember you opinion of other people only affects you. 'Other peoples opinion' is a thought which only affects you.

So although it is not easy to implement, stop caring about the behavior and actions of 'other people'. Why do you allow yourself to be troubled by your imaginations regarding other peoples activities?

Even if you think that they are getting influenced by your choices, your malice will affect none but yourself. Whatever you think about other people only affects you. Not the 'other person'. Realize this.

Let them be influenced by your choices or not, let not your mind be troubled over the actions of other people. Do not be bound to 'others' in thought.

Some thoughts are like addictions. Realize that what matters in the end is who you are. No matter how selfish this might sound, this is what is important.

Some realizations

Here are some of the things I've realized:

1. Most of our thoughts are spent in thinking about how 'other people' perceive us
2. The biggest worldly attachement is relationship
3. Inner silence is the greatest treasure

The day you stop caring about other peoples perception of 'you', that day you will find yourself free.
Stop chasing after meaningless relationships.
Be ruthless with what matters.
The man who has no relationship is definitely not the most unfortunate person.
We are terrified of being all alone.
Being completely alone and isolated from people is scary.
Work is more about relationships than activities.

Being fully alone can be a scary experience. We need the presence of other people to acknowledge our own existence. In the absence of 'other people', our sense of who we are starts to dissolve. All we see is the great emptiness that lies at the heart of existence. This creates a profound fear.

Relationship

Most of our energy is drained in maintaining relationships. The maintenance of relationships and thinking about our relationships with others is the largest consumer and drainer of our energy. Toxic relationships are like poison to the soul.

Yet relationship is what gives meaning to our lives. Living with this paradox requires wisdom and understanding. Prioritize a few key relationships. Forget about all others.

But above all, take time to reconnect with your inner self in silence. This is the most fundamental relationship and the one which matters most. In solitude, one finds the source of ones self. That is silence. This is the first relationship and the only one which truly matters in the end. All other relationships are artificial. Yet, one must have relationships in order to live.

Family relationships are important worldly relationships and must be maintained. Relationships with a few close friends is good to maintain. Relationship with your boss or employer is an important worldly relationship and must be maintained, but less important than family relationships.

Tread the soil of worldly relationships very carefully. They are the largest consumer of thought and the biggest attachment.

But in the end remember that the only relationship that truly matters is the one with your own inner self. This is realized in solitude. This is the relationship of absolute silence. The silence of pure awareness.

Travel

Traveling the world is the passion of a fool. What purpose is there in travel?
They say it is the journey that counts. But isn't our life itself a journey?

Travel is done to change the environment which changes one's habitual patterns of thought.
Putting oneself in an unfamiliar environment completely changes one's perspective.
We seek vacations from our routine. But the true vacation is vacation from the mind. This cannot be achieved through traveling. The mind remains no matter where you go. Placing yourself in a different environment merely changes the thoughts in your mind. Routine thoughts are replaced by different ones. This is the effect of travel. To change the repeated thoughts in the mind seems to be the effect of travel.

Void and choice

There is a great void that lies at the heart of existence.
All our activities and relationships are an escape from this void.
This void cannot be eliminated by any  activity or relationship.
Our only freedom lies in our response to this void.

Do you choose to start a family to avoid facing the void?
Do you choose to serve the nation to avoid facing the void?
Do you choose achievement?
Do you choose to become a prophet?

Or do you choose to live with it until death?

Our response to this void is the story of our life.

What story do you choose?

Consciousness alone is

Imagine that the world that you see outside is not really there.
Imagine that the person you think you are is not really there.
All that is seen is not what is there.
Neither is the one who imagines seeing it.
Only consciousness is.

So it has been said.

A fundamental doubt

What are some of the fundamental things that matter...let us investigate..

Imagine that you are right here right now....What is it that you exactly crave? What is it that you exactly fear?
This world fundamentally makes no sense...we find ourselves here and absolutely no clue about what to do or where to go? How does one decide what to do at this very moment? What needs to be explored? How is one supposed to feel? Who is one supposed to meet? What is one supposed to do? Who is one supposed to ask? Deep down, there exists a fundamental doubt. A fundamental doubt. Can this fundamental doubt be extinguished? All our pursuits seem to be a way to avoid facing the fundamental doubt. What is the fundamental doubt? Why are we so terrified of what others think of us? Who am 'I'?

Who
am
I?

Relationship

Thought itself is attachment. Relationships are one's biggest attachment here. The fear of being alone is the fear of having no relationships. Without relationships, who am I?

When there is no relationship, what remains? That which remains always, whether you are with someone or without, that alone is true. There can be no fundamental relationship. At a fundamental level, there is supreme aloneness. No relationship is possible at the deepest level. Relationship is only a thought. Who you are is incapable of relationship. Because there are no others here. Only emptiness.

Voidness

What is truly wisdom? No matter how many books or scriptures one pores through. Intellectual and theoretical knowledge is completely bland. It is of no use when the real tests arrive. When there is suffering or some great darkness has enveloped the mind, mere theoretical knowledge is completely useless. What then is of real value? A strategy to avoid suffering is of no use. Instead go deep into suffering and endure it. That itself will result in true knowledge. Knowledge which is part of your being. Mere reading of books is of no use here.

The truth as they say is 'Consciousness is all there is'. But how has knowing this really affected your life?
You find yourself still operating under the same thought patterns. Infact, you find that life is still exactly how it was before the knowledge arrived. Mere intellectual knowing makes absolutely no difference.

What is really the fundamental fear?
It is that if I do not act, if I refuse to be a part of life, I will die...
I fear that I am really incapable of deciding what actions to perform...
i find myself incapable of determining how to live an effective life..
I find myself incompetent...
I have no idea how to live my life...what needs to be done and what needs to be avoided
I am unable to determine the right time for action...
I am unable to determine whether to act on my desires or not to act on them..
I find myself unable to determine which path to choose..
Infact, I find myself completely incompetent in life skills...
I don't know what to do and what to avoid...
I don't know if I am right or wrong...
I find other people living life so smoothly whereas I keep stumbling along...
I find others so bold whereas I am stuck in my fears...
How is life supposed to feel like?
How am I supposed to decide what to do?
I find myself detesting other people
Detesting all whose lives seem so smooth...
What am I supposed to desire
What am I supposed to do
Is happiness the goal of life
Whose advice to follow
Should I hold on or let go?
Should I be working or relaxing?
Having choices is a source of great misery
How does one walk the middle path
Why is life so uncertain?
Why is my knowledge all theoretical?
 I don't know anything..
Should I even be writing this now?
My great tendency is to escape into isolation
Is it good or bad?
Who will answer these questions..
Only I see the thoughts in my head and the countless decisions made every second...
Why am I feeling so full of dread?
Is it only a thought effect?
Why do I feel terrified of isolating myself?
What is this world and who am I?
There is a great fear inside...
Fear of not knowing...
Its terrible, this state...
I feel like I am losing hold of things...
Falling into the void...
That I will fail...
And fall...
In this moment, there exists a great void...an absence
Nothing to do, no one to be with...

Consciousness is all there is

Remember this forever:

There is only consciousness.

Consciousness alone exits.

Consciousness is all there is.

This alone is everything. Nothing else needs to be known.

Thus we have been told.

Remember

Its good to remember this:
You cannot predict anything. The mind can only create deluded notions.
All these notions are nothing but fancies. It is better to not trust the mind.
Nothing that it shows is true. It leads only to greed and destruction.

Peace lies beyond all notions. Even the notion of liberation is bondage.

 

Living in the world of forms

This world appearance is inseparable from consciousness. Thus, it will never cease.
Consciousness will always assume some form, although only consciousness alone exists. Is it possible for a flower to exist without its perfume? Or ice to abandon its coolness? Similarly, this universe is nothing but consciousness. It is the flavor of consciousness.

So, the best course is to live in this world knowing the truth of consciousness. This world appearance is made possible by the mere existence of consciousness which alone exits.

Thus we have been told.
 

Fear of being alone

Who is afraid of loneliness and being alone?
It is only the mind which fears being alone.
The thought of being alone only occurs to the mind.
The Self alone is. Even the concept of being alone only makes sense when there is the thought of 'others'

When there are no others, there is no 'one'. This is a fundamental fear. Fear of 'non-existence'.
 

Relationship and misery

We spend our whole lives seeking meaningful relationships. Yet, it is relationships which cause us most suffering. It is our relationships that we are most attached to. It is here that most of our energies are directed. And it is here that most of our troubles are caused. There is nothing which causes so much misery as relationships. To be attached to relationships will cause nothing but suffering. Avoiding relationships will cause even more suffering. The best course therefore is to allow relationships to arise. No need to get attached or seek to avoid. Just remember that in every relationships, it is just a role that you are playing. You are not your role. You have absolutely nothing to gain or lose from relationships. Ultimately all relationships are illusory. No point being attached and giving over too much power to these issues.

When caught in the grip of relationship, remember that these are all just passing shows and have absolutely nothing to do with what you are. Caring too much breeds only misery. This includes approval by others. Caring about others approval or criticism is a complete waste of time. Be free from the bonds of relationship. Be free from the desire to avoid relationships as well. All your relationships are illusory. Consciousness alone exists.