What is this world?

What do I want? Why is there confusion? Why is there disturbance? Why is there still a sense of discontentment? Why is there unease? Why is there still uncertainty? Why is resolution still lacking? Why is there still a sense on bondage? Why is the heart still clenched? Why is there still not enough? Why is there still chasing after wealth? Why is there still fear? What is the problem statement of life?
What really is this world and what am I doing here? Who am I? What is this appearance? What is the problem? Why is there struggle?

The process of living life tends to generate confusion and chaos. The abundance of options expands the confusion. Modern life with its peculiar nature only expands confusion. Confusion clouds reality and generates fear and unease. We keep chasing after things, not knowing why we chase them. And even after we gain them, we are still uneasy. We fear losing the things we own. We fear the loss of our lifestyle. We fear the loss of income. We don't know what we really want. Wandering souls. We feel helpless. At the mercy of the external world.

To retain clarity and not get carried away is the only path to sanity.

The words of a sage

The mind of human beings are essentially the same mechanism. 
On the surface of all minds there is an incessant storm of self-referential thoughts. 
They cannot be stopped. 
They are the mind. 
The sense of self and the swirling mnemonic debris are the same phenomenon. 
In the center of all minds is a sublime quiescence. 
Many intuit its presence and attempt to access it through various practices such as meditation or shifting their focus to the "now". 
Long distance runners, surfers and musicians have their unique names for it. 
But it cannot be accessed through intentional effort that originates on the surface. 
The only difference between a sage and a seeker is a sage has one foot in the consensus conceptual overlay and one foot in the sublime quiescense. They experience their perceptual input being beautifully suspended between everything and nothing at all.

~excerpt 
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In your travels, you may make it to the edge and find yourself staring into the void. 
But you can't go there because......well..... because there's nothing there. 
And you will have to turn around and walk back into the dream knowing that with all it trials and tribulations....with all its uncertainties and scary things........knowing that it is all a mental fabrication.......it is the only place in the manifested universe that you, and all those you love, have any existence. 
This......this dream of separation is your only home. 
And it is grand far beyond anything you could ever imagine.

~excerpt  

The sorrow in the trap of the world

This world that you are born into is a very subtle trap. It traps by creating attachment to its fleeting joys and relationships. Your relationships are your primary source of attachment and loss of any relationship brings with it sadness and despair. Yet, you carry on. The force of life carries you on. You will lose your loved ones, your parents, your spouse and many more. Ever present movement and the flow of life keeps forever moving and changing and causing pain. To have even a slight attachment will result in sadness. The world is neither good nor evil. Its nature is change. And change disrupts. And it hides the changeless.

What can you do but go with the flow of change? What do you really know but this life that you live? And your tears are great cleansers. Cleansers of attachment and worldliness. Truly, there is no redemption to be found here. Only sorrow. Seek refuge, therefore in the sorrow less. The source reality. But there is no life there. Life is here and now, amidst the sorrow that you seek to overcome. Your loved ones are here in this world of change. All the little joys of life is here in the world of change. Oh, great one, you who seeks the truth of the universe and the one God, your life is here and here alone. Other than this, there is nothing else. The great irony. To get rid of sorrow, is to get rid of love. In the absence of love and sorrow, what remains is the changeless eternity.

Your tribe is here. Your love is here. Other than this, there is no love. You, the one who seeks to end sorrow. There is not truth that can be experienced. All that matters for you, dear one, is your perception. Perception of your state. Response to your particular sorrow. Attitude to life. Your only freedom. To choose your response to life. To choose your response to sorrow. To choose your response to change. To choose your response to death. In the end, the only thing that can be relied upon is your unique response to life. Your response to the vast suffering around. You choose your attitude. The most precious treasure. A small light in a dark place can bring joy. A small darkness in a bright place can bring sorrow. The only refuge from the relativities of life lies in the absolute alone.

The redemption

Even the most favorable circumstance imaginable leaves behind a sense of mild discomfort. Even if you are the king of the world, with the most beautiful and kind hearted wife and have an adorable family, there persists a lingering feeling of some unnameable emotion. The call of the infinite can never really be shut off completely. And no matter how favorable your circumstances may seem, they will change. And where there is change, there is no permanent satisfaction. No permanent contentment. The emptiness of the infinite never really leaves. But slowly starts to swallow.

Neither marriage, nor career nor good health can redeem. Only the infinite. And that my friend is not negotiable.

On the choice after death

That which has trapped you is the cultural conditioning, also known as the conditioned mind. Cultural beliefs seem to hold tremendous sway over your happiness and freedom. The thought that you have to study hard to pass exams, secure a job, get married, have kids, raise them, retire and demand care from kids in old age, and finally die. If you are unable to complete one stage, life will be misery. And the need for companionship. Any association with a body is suffering.The system is designed to eventually make you dependent on the system. And when you think that you are dependent on the system, you will do anything to be a part of the system. Any action which would make the system to abandon you is considered taboo. Our survival depends on being part of the system. The system is designed only to ensure its propagation and expansion through time. The greatest threat to the system is self realization or the awareness of truth. It is self denial and self deception that propagates the system. The awareness of truth is destruction of the system. Ignorance of the self allows the system to expand. Comparison with others leads only to frustration. To reveal the truth leads only to being branded as insane.

1. Everyday you wake up early to rush to work.
2. At work, you are doing something only so that a corporation can make money.
3. After work you come home totally exhausted, with a revolving mind, and are too tired and exhausted to do anything further.
4. Not working, you will have to face the ridicule and humiliation.
5. Not marrying, you will have to face ridicule and humiliation.
6. getting married will only increase your worries and demands on your time.
7. We go through life completely oblivious of the fact of our ridiculous situation.
8. Nothing on this earth is really valuable. In fact, suffering is much more intense than joy.
9. Why on earth would anyone choose birth (if a choice exists).
10. Is it really birth that is the problem or the nature of the system or our own gullibility? 
11. Hope is the biggest deceiver.
12. The relative nature of this world leads only to misery.

If there is truly a choice after death, do not choose rebirth. No matter how attractive the system might appear. Do not choose birth.

Eternity

There are no moments in timelessness. Only eternity. And eternity does not allow for the existence of even a single moment. If eternity exists, there can be no time. True resting is to rest in eternity.

What I am

It feels like I don't really belong to the world. That 'I' am not really located in this dimension of space and time. That 'I' have never really belonged to the universe. That 'I' have never really had a relationship. That 'I' have never been seen ever.

That 'I' am not of this dimension. That 'I' am the deepest mystery. That 'I' am apart from all.

Strange.